


Burning Up

by Red_House



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Blow Jobs, Dancing, Fucked Up, Hux is Not Nice, Hux is nicer than Kylo but, I'm Going to Hell, I'm Sorry, It Gets Worse, It Gets Worse Before It Gets Better, Multi, Not Canon Compliant, Poe Dameron Needs A Hug, Poe Dameron is loyal to his friends, Post-Star Wars: The Force Awakens, Rape/Non-con Elements, Satan cringes as he thinks about what I plan to do to these poor characters, Stupidity, The First Order throws fancy parties, The First Order wins, Vomiting, i have no life, new tags ever chapter, send help, there is a special place in hell for me
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-13
Updated: 2018-02-02
Packaged: 2018-07-23 17:58:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 20
Words: 38,285
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7474212
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Red_House/pseuds/Red_House
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alise was a spy for the Resistance until she was captured by the First Order.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> updated

His eyes gaze deeply into hers as he slowly leans in to kiss her. Why does he want to do that? What will he gain? Is it just to torment her further? 

These thoughts are shoved to the back of her mind as his lips meet hers. She closes her eyes, and allows the tears she was holding back, to slide down her face. Why her? What does he want her for? He pulls away and for a beat he stares down her. 

It is near impossible to discern his thoughts, and emotions, but she knows from experience what he wants. She wants to fight but then acquiesces to him as he pushes her to the floor. As much as she hates it, she doesn’t fight him. She allows herself to be pushed onto her knees, and she doesn’t fight him as he roughly shoves his dick into her mouth. She knows what to do. 

Closing her eyes, she begins to work. Bobbing her head up and down his shaft, and swirling her tongue around it. She doesn’t want to have to think about what’s happening, but he has other ideas. Above her he lets out a low growl, and feels a sharp tug on her hair. He wants her to look at him while she sucks him off. She knows better than to make him angry. He chokes her by pushing himself in to the base. Her eyes snap open and look up at him. 

The look in his eyes is predatory. He looks like a animal that has just cornered his prey, and is ready to pounce at the first sign of weakness. She feels frozen in fear, more tears flow down her cheeks. He begins to move her head to with his hands, and soon she feels him close to orgasm. Her tears continue flow freely, and he doesn’t even break eye contact with her the entire time, she can’t look away. He pushes himself in all the way again, and cums. 

She does her best to swallow all of it, but some leaks out the corners of her mouth. There is a long moment as he stands there, clutched by the claws of ecstasy, then pulling her off of his now soft member. She falls back on the floor and curls up into a ball, still crying. He fixes his clothes, replaces his helmet, and strides out of the room, doors closing behind him. Small pathetic sobs escape her body. She aware that he will not return until later tonight. After what feels like an eternity of quiet sobbing, she falls asleep. 

All she wants is to escape, but she knows the only way to truly escape is to die. It terrifies her.


	2. chapter 2

She wakes to feel a pair of gloved hands picking her up. She can’t seem to open her eyes, but that’s ok with her for now. The person is carrying her gently, with one arm under her back, and the other holding the backs of her knees. 

Something about the texture of the person’s clothes feels familiar. The fabric feels ruffled, sturdy, and is rough against her skin. It hurts her head to think, but for some reason alarms sound in her head. Then it hits her like a ton of bricks. Kylo Ren is the one carrying her. All signs of previous sleepiness disappears, and she tenses up. She hears a deep distorted chuckle come from above her. “I’m not going to hurt you,” he reassures her? It is hard to tell with the mask altering his voice. He is carrying her to some unknown location. She wants to ask where they are going, but a memory of punishment for speaking without permission stops her. Despite her worry, it seems like he is in a good mood, and he answers her unasked question. “My quarters.” 

At first she is excited to leave the cold, empty room with only a small refresher, but then she realizes this might mean more of her time will be spent with Ren. More chances for her to mess up, and more chances for punishment. 

He pauses, a door opens, and a few seconds later she is placed onto a set of soft sheets. Finally, she can open her eyes, and looks up to see him staring down at her. It takes a moment for her to bring herself to look away. Her eyes widen as she takes in the room around her. 

The walls are the same as the room she was in before, but lining one of the walls has floor to ceiling shelves filled completely with books. The wall to the right has a door, most likely leading to the refresher. And finally the bed she is sitting on is soft, with dark grey sheets, it large enough to fit three people with room to spare. She looks back at him. His arms are folded across his chest, and he is studying her behind his mask. She wants to ask questions, and he inclines his head slightly. 

“Why did you bring me here?” She asks.  
“Convenience.” He replies after a short pause.  
“Where will I sleep?” She is genuinely curious at what his response will be.  
“My bed.” He answers.

She debates weather asking her last question will get her in trouble. She wants to read some of the books, but decides against asking.  
He answers her question anyway, “No.”  
She isn’t too disappointed by this, just because he is in an abnormally good mood doesn’t mean he is going to give her everything she wants. In fact this is the first time he has ever really spoken to her. Not yelling, questioning, or ordering her around, just have a conversation of sorts with her. It made her wonder what has him in such a good mood. 

He answers her thoughts again, “We have most of the New Republic, and The Resistance cornered in a small system. Soon they will be eradicated from the galaxy. Then the First Order, and the Supreme Leader will be in their rightful place within the galaxy, ruling it.” She couldn’t help the involuntary shiver that goes up her spine. He either doesn’t notice or doesn’t care, because he doesn’t comment on it. He turns and begins stride out of the room, but pauses in the doorway, “Use the refresher, and wait for me on the bed.”

With that he leaves her alone in the room. A tear rolls down her cheek. The Resistance isn’t coming for her, not while the First Order has them trapped. She is never going to be rescued, and the rest of her life, or how ever long she is useful to Ren, she will be in the care of the First Order. She decides it is best to do what he says. He may have been relatively nice to her, but provoking him in anyway could make his calm demeanor turn aggressive very quickly. 

She stands, and enters the refresher to relieve herself. When she finishes, she starts the shower. Her thoughts drift back to the Republic and Resistance. A stray thought pops into her head, what if her friends are dead? She tries not to think about it, but the thought clings to the edges of her mind and eat away at her. More tears roll down her face. It hurts her to think about. She steps into the shower, and feels the icy cold water run over her. For a moment she just lets the freezing stream of water sink into every pore. She turns the water up a bit, and grabs the soap and begins washing her body. 

She looks down at her herself. Her body has little bruises and marks littering her torso and limbs. It doesn’t take very long to clean off any dirt on her skin. Her hair is slightly matted, and long. After a few minutes she decides that she’s clean enough. Turning the water off, she steps out of the shower. The mirror is fogged from the hot air, but she can just make out her features. She wipes the fog away to see her face staring back. At first she doesn’t notice many differences from before her capture. Then little things catch her eye. Her face is thinner, hair longer, and skin paler, not incredibly different, but clearly changed. 

She looks down to the rest of her body. Other than the marks she noticed earlier, she is mostly the same, paler from her time on the star destroyer, and thinner from being fed just enough to stay alive. She meets the eyes of her reflection, and notices the sadness and apprehension in them. They almost look glazed over. She looks away quickly. Glancing around, she grabs a towel, and starts drying her hair. As she peers around the room, she notices a window. The stars slowly passing by the window mesmerize her. It has been so long since she had seen anything other than the walls of a star destroyer. 

It takes her a moment, but she remembers where she is, and starts drying her hair. The towel flops in her face blocking out everything, and she feels a pair of arms wrap around her. She doesn’t move, towel still in her face. Her blood runs cold. Is he going to punish her for taking to long to get washed? Before she can worry too long, a voice, not Kylo Ren’s, but a softer voice, a familiar voice whispers in a happy, and slightly surprised tone. “I found you.”

She twirls around, to see her lifelong friend, and ace pilot, Poe Dameron. He smiles at her, and glances around. “Nice room, let's go before they track me here,” he whispers hurriedly to her as he takes her hand.  
It takes a moment for her to respond. “It’s not my room, how did you find me, and where are we going?”  
“I overheard a stormtrooper talking about you being brought here,” He answers quickly. He pauses then asks, “Who’s room is this than?”  
“Kylo Ren’s.” She replies quietly.

Poe looks at her with a shocked and saddened expression, and whispers, “Where is he? Did he hurt you?”  
She shakes her head, and looks at him. “Why are you here? You didn’t come here for me, did you.”  
He looks at her then says quickly, “We need to go, if these really are Ren’s quarters, I don’t want to be here when he gets back. A repeat performance of my last stay on a star destroyer doesn’t sound advisable.” After a brief pause, “No, we didn’t come for you, but I’m not leaving you here, alone with Ren.”

At that Poe grabs her hand and leads her back into the bedroom. There is a momentary pause before he searches through Ren’s closet, pulls out a large shirt, and hands it to her. The moment the shirt is over her head, Poe drags her to the door. They rush through corridors, only stopping when a patrol of stormtroopers announces their presence with the loud clanking of armor. In no time, they are nearing a hanger. Before either of them can move towards the large doors leading to potential freedom, the alarms begin blaring. She takes a deep stuttering breath, and she feels her heart rate increase. Someone is shaking her, and calling her name.

“Ali. Alise! Alise, can you hear me?” Poe. It’s just Poe.  
“He’s coming Poe. He coming for me. I shouldn’t have run!” Ali starts to sob.  
“Hey, stop that, you’re all right. I’ve got you, and I’ll protect you for as long as I can. As long as I am able to defend you, I will. Do you understand? I’ll do everything I can to protect you from Ren. Now we need to move, ok Ali?”

She nods and follows him as they make their way to a small room off to the side. Poe gestures to a closet nearby. She gives him a confused look, and he shoves her inside with little warning. A chill runs down her spine. The door is wrenched open, and a dozen stormtroopers rush into the confined space. Two of them grab him, and push to the ground. Through the cracks in the door, Ali can just make out Ren entering the room. It takes everything in her not to scream. Ren moves closer to Poe, and just stares at him for a moment.  
“Where is she?” The mechanical sound of his voice through the mask sends a shiver down her spine. 

Poe stares straight ahead, and spits out through clenched teeth, “Fuck you.”  
Ren doesn’t respond, but addresses the room, or more accurately he addresses Ali.  
“If she is in this room, and continues to hide, I will kill this man.”

Her heart pounds, but she opens the closet door as confidently as possible. Something inside her has changed. She stands up straight, and maintains eye contact with Ren’s mask as she comes to stand behind Poe. A part of her knows most of this is just for show, and that in a moment, she will crumple under Ren’s eyeless gaze.

“Take him to a cell, I’ll deal with him later.” He says as he turns from her, and she feels her confidence evaporate. The stormtroopers leave the room, dragging an unusually quiet Poe with them. Ren takes her in for a moment longer, before gesturing for her to stand in front of him. She takes a few timid steps closer to him, before pausing.  
“I’m not angry with you. Come here.”  
She takes another few steps to stand in front of him, her eyes glued to the floor. He grabs her chin gently with his fingers, and tilts her head up to face him. They stand for a moment, before he drops his hand to his side, “Come.”

She stares at his back for a moment, then slowly follows him back to his quarters. When she arrives in the room, he is lounging on a chair, and he casually gestures to the bed. Resting on the it is a large box. She walks over, and opens it. Carefully reaching inside she pulls out a floor length dress. It is simple and elegant. It mostly red, with a black sash around the waist, and dark sheer sleeves. “Put it on.” Ren says lightly, though she know it isn’t a suggestion.

She pulls the small zipper down, and steps into the dress. After pulling on the sleeves, she reaches around behind her back for the zipper. She gets it up about two inches before she can’t zip it up anymore. She fumbles with it for a minute, until a larger pair of hands grab the zipper from her. She holds her hair up, and lets him zip her into the gown. His arms pull her body against his, and whispers into her ear, “You’re my guest to the party this evening.” He paused a moment and spins her around. “Can you dance?”

“Yes, of course I can.” She affirms.  
He nods his head absently. Suddenly he turns and saunters over to the chair he was sitting in earlier. She stares at him for a moment.  
“Braid your hair,” he says dismissively.  
“What?” she replies incredulously.  
“Do I need to repeat myself?”

She shakes her head, and quickly begins to follow his command. After reaching the end of her hair, she glances around for something to tie her hair with. The first thing she sees is the ribbon from the box, she carefully ties the end of her braid with it.  
Ren stands from his chair, and he approaches her. She turns to face him. He looks her up and down appraisingly, and she can’t help but squirm under his gaze. He stretches a hand out to her, and she slowly reaches up rests her hand in his. As he pulls her up he says, “Come, we have a party to attend.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :P


	3. Chapter 3

The walk to the hanger where the party is being held is mostly quiet. He feels it necessary to, for some reason, keep one of his hands on the small of her back the entire time. Her mind wanders a bit and she wonders why he decided to bring her. 

“I was bored, and I had no one to bring with me on such short notice,” He responds.

She sighs the whole answering the questions she doesn’t ask is getting annoying.  
He snorts, but doesn’t say anything else until they are outside of the hanger bay. “Don’t talk about your history with the resistance, unless you are asked, and don’t talk back to people,”   
She opens her mouth to ask if he counts as “people”, but he beats her to it by just shaking his head, she almost feel his annoyance at her attempt at a joke.

“So I shouldn’t cause trouble.” She states.  
“Yes.” He says before steering her into the doorway. He holds out an arm to her, and she loops her arm in his. They walk in together, and people start staring their way. She remains calm as he leads her to a redhaired man standing with a tall, blonde woman. She has heard mention of Hux, the redhaired general, by Ren on many, many occasions. 

“Good to see you could make it Ren, and it seem you managed to convince someone to attend with you.” He says coolly before turning his attention to her. “Who are you? What did he offer you to make you come with him?”   
She glances at Ren before turning back the the redhead, “General Hux I presume?” He nods slightly and she continues, “He told me I could come with you instead.”   
Hux raises an eyebrow, “I see you get your sense of humor from him,” He says dryly.

“At least I have a sense of humor,” Ren retorts for her.  
The blonde woman sighs and looks down at Ali, “They could be at this all night, so if you don’t want evening filled with childish arguing, you should come with me.”   
Ali nods and follows the woman through the crowds of people. The woman, Captain Phasma, as Ali soon learns, introduces her to so many people, that she barely has time to learn the name of one person before she steered off to meet another person. Eventually Phasma leads her to a large u-shaped configuration of tables. She leads Ali to the head of the tables, and points to one of the chairs, “You will be sitting there for dinner.” 

“Where will General Hux, and Kylo Ren be sitting?”  
Phasma just looks at her a moment, before sitting. Everyone else in the room begins making their way towards the tables and taking their seats. She feels someone behind her, and she sits in the chair they pull out for her. She turns slightly to see Hux. “Hello again. Ren will be back later, had some important business to attend to.”

“Yes, of course.” She says with as much dignity as she can muster. “Will he be long?”  
“He didn’t say.” He responds absently.

Then he seems to become aware of his surroundings, and takes his seat. A man stands and begins speaking to the people seated at the tables. She zones out after a few sentences. He seems to be talking about nothing important. Her thoughts drift back to Poe. She is in the middle of a memory, when a sentence drags her back to reality, “The destruction of the Resistance and their treacherous Republic imminent. Today is a day of celebration. Their power broken, they will never be able to raise from the rubble. We are at the gates of victory, let us destroy any remnant of them from the galaxy, and bring order back into a corrupt system!” as he finishes his speech, there is a thunderous round of applause from everyone in the hanger.

She begins clapping quickly as to not draw attention to herself. The room slowly quiets down as food is brought out, and laid on the tables. Her thoughts are drawn back to words she had heard him say. So Ren wasn’t lying to her. She stares at the food laid out in front of her; she has no appetite anymore. The empty chair to her left is pulled out, and a low voice whispers to her, “It won’t bite.”

She looks over at him. He is still wearing his mask. 

“Don’t you ever eat?” She asks suddenly.  
He chuckles and inclines his head, “You should eat, you’ll wish you had later.”   
She pulls her eyes away from him, and reaches for some kind of meat. As she eats, she begins studying her surroundings. There are ships lining the wall, and an entire wall that leads out into space. She idly wonders if he will stop her if she tries to jump out. 

He apparently isn’t listening to her thoughts at the moment, because he doesn’t answer her. It is tempting to ‘accidently fall out’ if it means never having to see him and his mask ever again. “I’ll pull you back in, and punish you for trying to run away from me.” He hisses in ear. 

She turns and looks at him. His mask is barely inches from her face. It isn’t an empty threat, but it scares her less now that is accustom to being punished.  
“Or I could just torture your friend.” He responds to her thoughts. “Either way, you will regret ever attempting to escape.” 

She looks away again, but still feels his eyes on her. They sit like that for what feels like hours, before a some silent signal has everyone standing, and moving to a large open area. He is holding his hand out to her again, and this time when she takes it he grips it tighter than necessary. 

They walk to the center of the clearing, there are more people standing with partners in the circle. He turns to face her, and rests his other hand on her waist. She looks at him a moment before placing a hand on his shoulder. They all stand silently, before music begins to play. He looks down at her as they begin to move in time to the music. 

He is a surprisingly good dancer, she realizes. They move together like they have danced million times before. As the music slowly draws to a close she realizes they are the only two left in the circle. The people lining the clearing begin cheering. He stands with her for a moment, before a low ranking officer runs up, and delivers Ren a message. Even without the force she can tell he is pissed. Then, as a new song begins to play, he pulls her out circle and back towards the tables. Only a few people still stand around the tables, including General Hux.

“I was unaware you knew how to dance, Ren.” Hux comments.  
He ignores Hux’s remark, “General, if you would keep an eye on my companion, I have something to take care of at the moment.” 

Before Hux can answer Ren turns and strides towards the exit. Hux looks over at her, “Who are you?” he asks for the second time that evening.   
She stares after Ren for a moment before answering, “My name is, Alise” 

“I see you are less insolent when Ren isn't around.” He says with a slight smirk. “Tell me, why did he bring you? You don’t seem like his type.”   
“What is his type?” She asks mildly curious.  
“I always assumed he likes the type that doesn’t fight back. The type that doesn’t try to bite of his dick.” He responds calmly, and he studies her expression. “Why you?”  
“I don’t know myself,” She admits. “When I asked him, he said he was bored.” 

He scoffs, “I’m not that surprised, that sounds like the type of thing he would do.”  
He takes a moment to collect his thoughts, and regain his composure, before offering her his arm. “I want to know,” he says as he leads her to the open hanger doors, “do you even like him in the slightest?”

She looks at him, “Why do you want to know?”  
“I’m just curious,” he responds casually.  
“I… respect him,” she answers carefully.

“That’s not what I asked,” Hux says with an amused expression.  
“I think he is… a frustrating person,” she replies, then adds quickly, “That doesn’t mean I don’t like being around him.”

He looks down at her with a cocked eyebrow. “How do you really feel?”  
“It’s hard to love someone who you hate,” she finally snaps. “Everytime he is near me I want to run as far away as I can. He has no respect for my personal space, and he wants me to do anything and everything to please him, but I want to die. When he touches me my skin crawls, and I want to push him away,” she gazes into Hux’s face. “I know you know. When did you figure it out?”

He looks out at the stars, expression hard. “I wasn’t sure until now.”

Sighing, she and pulls her arm away from him. She didn’t realize how cold the air is until now. Wrapping her arms herself, she shivers. A slightly heavy weight rests on her shoulders. A thick coat hangs around her, it brushes the ground. He gave his greatcoat to her. 

“You owe me something now resistance scum,” he whispers. “We both have a mutual hate for Ren, so tell me, what will piss him off most?”  
it takes her a moment to respond.

“This,” she says as she stands on her tiptoes. He looks down at her and leans in to gently touch lips. Hux grabs her chin, and tilts her head back further. They only break apart when they hear the sound of angry growling. Hux quickly pulls his coat of her as Ren grabs her, and drags her away behind him. She glances back a moment and sees Hux smile smugly. The hand on her arm tightens and his steps slow he walks out with her in tow. She has a sinking feeling that was a very bad decision.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Figured out how long I think I want it to be. Probably not going to update super often in the next couple of weeks.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know where I want to go with this story now! Yay! So I should be able to post more regularly!   
> *crawls back into pit*

He drags her back into his room, the door shuts behind them. He shoves her to the floor, before marching through another door. She doesn’t dare to breath for fear of provoking him even more. He reappears in the doorway, and stalks over to her. He pulls her up onto her feet by her hair. “Strip.” he orders. She quickly reaches behind her back, pulls the zipper down, and steps out of the dress. 

Slowly circling her, he studies her shivering frame. He stops behind her, and wraps his arms around her stomach, pulling her against him. They stand like that a moment, then the door opens and a stormtrooper pushes Poe into the room. He stumbles a bit, before righting himself. He is about to say something to the stormtrooper, but stops when he realizes where he is, and who is watching him. There is a moment of silence then, “What do you want, Ren?” Poe questions. 

She feels the arms constrict slightly, and a weight rest on head. “I want to know the location of your secondary resistance base.” He coos.   
Poe clenches his jaw, “I already told you, there is no secondary base.” then glances down at her for half a second, a gesture that doesn’t go unnoticed by Ren.  
Kylo lets her go, and stalks toward Poe. “You can withstand interrogation, you have a high pain tolerance I’ll give you that, but you have a weakness.” He is a foot from Poe now and is towering over him when Ren says, “Her.”

She hears the unspoken threat laced into the word. He isn’t unwilling to torture her to get at Poe. Poe looks at her, and she shakes her head, trying to tell him not to say anything, to not watch. He looks back at Ren. “I don’t care about her.”

It stings a little to hear him say, but knows he is trying to convince himself. Ren laughs and walks back to her. He grabs her again and holds her. A hand moves her throat and he squeezes gently at first, then slowly increases the pressure of his hold. “Where is the base?” 

Poe looks down at her and she shakes her head ever so slightly, and all concern disappears from his expression, “There is no base.”  
The hand around her neck is removed, and a pair of fingers are pushed into her mouth. At first she does nothing, just staring at Poe. The arm around her stomach tightens, and she begins sucking gently. “I’ll make a deal with you Dameron, you tell me where to base is, and I let you go. I’ll even give you a headstart, but I keep her to do whatever I want with. Or you tell me where the base is, and you stay, but I’ll leave her alone for tonight. Tell me where it is now and I’ll let you choose.” 

Poe looks between the two of them, he looks slightly upset. She tries to tell him not to take the deal with her eyes. “I…” Poe looks at her again, and back up at Ren, “How do I know   
you’ll keep your end of the bargain?”

“You’ll have nowhere to hide,” Ren responds calmly. “It doesn’t matter where you run to, we will find you again.”

Poe shakes his head, “No, the other one. How do I know you won’t just wait for me to leave the room?”

“She’ll sleep in your cell.” 

Poe looks down at her again. “I accept.”

She feels her stomach drop. Poe gave up the Resistance for her? What the fuck is he thinking?  
“Where is the base?” Ren asks sharply

“Corellia. The southern side of the planet.” Poe answers, but is looking at Ali.   
Ren releases her, and walks to the door, it opens, and he speaks to the guards outside. “Take the prisoner back to his cell.” 

Poe is pulled out of the room, kicking and screaming at Ren for lying. The door shuts and he turns to her. He stalks back towards her. She takes a step back for each of his steps forward, she bumps into a wall and can’t move. He keeps walking towards her until she is pinned to the wall. He pulls his helmet off, and brushes his lips against her ear. “You want me to keep my end of the bargain, don’t you?” he whispers.

She nods slowly. 

“Why should I? He is resistance scum, and deserves nothing from me.” He counters.  
He stares down at her, holding her eyes in his intense gaze. His face is extremely close to her’s. She leans in, and places her lips against his. Please? She thinks. He pulls away ever so slightly and chuckles, “You’ll have to do better than that.” 

She frowns a little, and leans in closer, this time actually kissing him. Please? She thinks a little harder. He looks amused and cocks an eyebrow. She looks at him a moment, before parting her lips. His tongue plunges into her mouth, and he explores her mouth. What feels like hours later, but is only a few moments, he breaks the kiss he stares down at her a moment longer. He walks away and pulls out a large shirt and a pair of pants. “Put them on.” He advises. 

As she pulls the clothes on he put his mask back on, and leaves the room. The pants fit her perfectly but the shirt is too big and it slips off one of her shoulders. While she waits for him to return, she sits on the bed, then curls up on the sheets. She doesn’t remember falling asleep, but a hand gently shakes her awake. “Dameron was telling the truth. We found a Resistance base on Corellia. You need to wake up if you want me to keep my end of the deal.” He says quietly.   
She blinks sleepily, and sits up. He gently pulls her up, and leads her to the door. 

“Follow me.” he commands

She nods, and walks behind him. The walk is long, but she wakes up enough to keep pace with him. After an immeasurable amount of silence they stop outside a door. “Wait.” he tells her, as he steps into the room. The door closes and she stands in the empty hall, waiting. The door opens again, and Ren is standing in the doorway, angry shouting is coming from the room behind him. He moves aside enough for her to pass, and when she does the yelling stops.

“Ali,” Poe asks, “Are you alright?” 

She looks at him and smiles weakly. “Yes, I’m fine.”

The door shuts behind her, and he stands and quickly strides over to her. “Did he do anything to you? Are you hurt?” 

“No, no. I’m fine!” She shakes her head. “What did he tell you?”

Poe looks away, “He said they found the base, and that he would consider keeping his promise.”  
“Is that why you were screaming?” she asks with a slight smirk.

“Yeah,” he says thickly. “I couldn't stand the thought of him touching you. I couldn't let him have you.”  
“Why give up the Resistance for me?”

“The Resistance? The Resistance is dead, I knew even if I didn't tell them, they would find the base eventually. I wanted something good to come from my betrayal.”  
They share a tense moment of silence. 

“Everyone thought you were dead. That’s why we didn’t try to rescue you, when you first got caught. After our other spies heard you had been captured, they had to keep their heads down for a while. There were some people that thought you were still alive, but no one believed them. That is until one of the spies got the information to us. At that point we were fighting a losing battle, and most of our fighters were trapped on Q’dar. We couldn’t do anything about it.” He explains. “Most of the higher ups didn’t want to spare the resources to rescue a single spy who got caught. The ones that did were mostly worried about what information you had. Everyone wondered why you were being kept alive.” He pauses a moment, and asks, “How long?”

“It started a couple weeks after they caught me,” she answers. “It took him a week to get the information, but I know he was drawing it out.”

“Where were you working?” He looks at her with a questioning expression.

“A neutral system, I in the capitol at the time. They came and took over the entire system in less than two cycles. I was posing as a courier in the government building.” She recounted. 

“I was there when they took the capitol. Ren ordered me to deliver a message to someone, I don’t remember who, but it was a trap. It looked like a report of where their fleet was, and when I tried to send it to the Resistance, they knew I was a spy. I didn’t realize they had found out until it was to late,” she finishes her story. 

Poe nods and looks a little forlorn. They stand a moment, before he gestures to the metal shelve that serves as a bed. “You can take the bed.” he offers.  
“No you shouldn’t give up your luxuries to make me more comfortable.” She says with a smirk.

“Honestly the floor is probably more comfortable,” He retorts with a smile. “I’m only half joking.”

They both start laughing. Laughing at his joke, but also because they know they might never see each other alive again after this. They want something happy to remember each other. As their laughter comes to an end they sit beside each other on the “bed.” They stare at one another before embracing. 

“I missed you.” She whispers.

Poe pulls her in closer and whisper back, “Me too.”

They lay back down on the shelf and hold each other until they fall asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes I just forget to post, and now I feel bad.   
> Sorry for the three month break, I've had a busy schedule the last few months.  
> I'm not abandoning this story, I might take a while to post anything but I will post. I promise you that.


	5. Chapter 5

Her eyes open to see Poe’s staring back at her. The moment stretches out and they both refuse to break the silence first. The sound of the door opening draws Poe’s attention, and he pulls her a bit closer. His eyes are focused on an unseen thing. She is tempted to look but wants to delay the inevitable for as long as possible.

Poe’s eyes follow the movement of a person as they approach. He has a reproachful expression on his face as Kylo Ren comes closer to them and stands behind her. Strong arms pull her up off the bed and he begins walking away without a word. She looks at Poe around Ren’s arm and sees the bitterness in his eyes as he stares after them. A wave of tiredness washes over her, and she falls unconscious.

She wakes up slowly, in a soft, warm bed. Her mind feels heavy and tried. It takes a bit of effort, but she manages to open her eyes. The ceiling above her is same as every other one she’d woken up to for the past year or so. 

She groans and rolls over in the bed. The urge to pee begins to nag at her once she gets comfortable again. Standing up, she stumbles into the refresher. After she finishes, she stands in front of the glass and stares out at the stars that lazily drift by the window. She wants to stand there forever, but the soft sheets call to her, and she is cold. As she walks back into the bedroom, she realizes that she isn’t the only one awake. Sitting on the chair across from the bed is Ren. She stiffens a little and stops walking. 

He is staring at her. “Go back to sleep,” he mutters. 

“I’m not tired anymore,” She whispers while shaking her head. 

He looks her up and down, before looking back into her eyes. After staring each other down for a long moment, then he pushes up out of his chair and stalks over to her. Once he gets close enough he leans over and whispers in her ear, “Do you really want me to fuck you that bad?” 

She scrambles back quickly, but he matches her step for step. Her legs bump against the bed, and she scampers under the sheets, trying to hide. He lets out a low chuckle and pulls the covers back until he can see her face. He stares down at her and strokes her cheek. 

“Sleep,” he whispers again, and she closes her eyes. This time, when she wakes up she doesn’t move. She recalls him being angry at her for something she did earlier. He still hasn’t done anything to punish her for it, and she is scared about what it will be. 

Her stress makes it hard to focus on anything, but lying in bed, staring at the wall and waiting. All morning and afternoon she just lies ther, but the only one who comes is a stormtrooper, who brings her breakfast, then later lunch. 

Her fear doesn't go away, but she calms down enough to use the refresher and eat some food. Just when she thinks he isn’t going to come back for her, the door opens to reveal Ren. He strides towards her, grabs her, and drags her out the door before she even registers what is going on. 

He drags her down the halls of the star destroyer. She has to almost run to keep up with him. They stop momentarily to open a door and he shoves her inside. The door shuts behind him, and he stands there staring down at her. She recognizes the room. It’s the interrogation chamber. The chair with restraints is in the middle of the room. 

“I’ll give you a choice, you get in and let me strap you down,” he offers, “or you don’t move and I punish you accordingly, either way, you won’t like the outcome.” 

She ponders his offer and slowly pushes herself up. Inching towards the chair she climbs into it, “Are you sure?” he asks and tilts his head to the side slightly.

She stares into his mask and nods.

He strides to her and locks the cuffs. With that, he turns and leaves the room. Time passes and she wonders if she should have chosen the floor instead. It would have been more comfortable, she decides. Her musings are cut short by the door opening and Poe being dragged in by a pair of stormtroopers, followed by Ren. Poe notices her almost instantly and tries to move closer, but stops mid-stride. 

“Leave us,” he says to the stormtroopers and turns back to the prisoners.

Ren stands between the two of them, staring Poe down. 

“You both have been very disobedient haven’t you,” he says as he begins to circle them. “I was going to keep you separate, but then I realized neither of you would get the message. Now all I need something that she won’t forget, to remind her of her place. And you Dameron, you decided you wanted to escape. I was going to beat you within an inch of your life, but you'll try again even if I do, won't you?” he stops in front of Poe and tilts Poe's head up to look him in the face. 

“I needed something that had never happened to you before, and something she would never forget.” Poe’s face go pale. 

Ren laughs, and let's go Poe’s face, “No, not her,” he pauses to see Poe’s reaction, then continues, “You.”

Poe’s eyes widen slightly and his mouth falls open in horror. He looks like he is going to vomit. Ren pushes Poe to the floor and starts pulling Poe’s clothes off with a calm deliberance. 

She didn’t understand what they were talking about until now, but once she does, she starts begging Ren to stop. He ignores her completely and continues to remove Poe’s clothes. Once he is done he moves away, and Poe crawls backward until he hits a wall. She is crying and begging him to not hurt Poe. He stands over her and runs a thumb across her bottom lip and whispers, “You chose this.” 

He turns around and stares at Poe before removing his mask. He strides towards Poe, before crouching down. They stare at each other then he whispering something to Poe, something that makes Poe’s face go from pale to green. Ren stands and slowly sheds layer after layer of clothing before standing nothing but his tunic and pants. 

Poe looks away and closes his eyes, as Ren removes the last of his clothing. Poe is staring off to the side trying hard not to think about what is happening. Ren reaches out and grabs Poe, pulling him into a kneeling position.

“Open your mouth, Dameron,” he coos as he presses his cock to Poe’s lips.

Poe shakes his head slightly.

“No?” Ren’s voice is sickly sweet. “Your choice.”

With that, he shoves Poe to the floor and flips him onto his stomach. Poe tries to scramble away, but Ren grabs his hips and drags him back. Poe is crying and shaking his head. Ren laughs and rocks his hips against Poe’s. 

“The more you struggle the longer I fuck you,” Ren hisses in his ear, “and I can last a very long time.”

A whimper slips from Poe at Ren’s words. She knows from experience that he isn’t lying. 

“Beg me to fuck you.” Ren orders calmly, when Poe says nothing, “How long this lasts is up to you, Dameron.” 

A few heartbeats later, and Poe whispers something. Ren grabs Poe by the hair and pulls his head back.

“What did you say, Dameron?” Ren asks. 

Poe says it a little louder, but still too quiet to hear.

“I can’t hear you, Dameron.” Ren’s voice is calm, but there is a dangerous edge to it. 

Poe sobs slightly, and says loud enough for Ali to hear, “Please...f-fuck me.” 

Ren pushes Poe’s head back down, and spits out, “Pathetic.”

Poe hiccups a little as Ren lines up. He takes a moment to enjoy Poe’s whimpering, before thrusting in full force. Poe screams in pain, and starts sobbing, and clawing at the floor. Ren pauses for a second before setting up a brutal pace. 

She tries to block out what is happening, but Ren turns and hisses, “I’ll do this again and again until you watch, and I don’t think Dameron can take that, do you?” 

She looks back at the scene unfolding in front of her. Poe has blood running down his thighs and is sobbing. His hands still claw futilely at the floor beneath him. His back arches all of a sudden. The action makes Ren laugh, and Poe moans in between sobs. Ren keeps the fast pace but repositions slightly and continuously makes Poe writhe under him.

“Enjoying yourself, Dameron?” Ren asks mirthfully.

Poe shakes his head and moans.

“Really?” he whispers.

He then grabs Poe’s hardened dick and strokes it. Poe lets out a gasp, and shakes his head more, “Pl...please….don’t.” Poe whimpers.

Ren doesn’t respond, but his lips twist into a smirk and strokes Poe’s dick. Poe’s legs give out, but he is still held in place by Ren’s hand on his hip. Ren strokes Poe’s dick until it twitches. He begins shaking his head again, and he comes on the floor with a sob. Finally, Ren comes inside of Poe. He holds Poe up a moment longer and then drops him in the puddle of his own cum. Ren stands wipes himself off on Poe’s shirt and begins replacing his clothes. He releases her bonds as he replaces his helmet. 

“Come,” he commands through the distortion of the mask.

She glances at Poe. He is curled into a tight ball in a mixture of blood, and his and Ren’s come. His shoulders are shaking and small whimpering sobs escape from him. But she walks by him and follows Ren back to his quarters. She glances back once before the door closes to see him staring blankly back at her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tbh I hate myself a little for this chapter. I love Poe so much, but I did this to him...
> 
> I'm currently trying to write most of the chapters out so I can edit them and make sure the story doesn't have any continuity errors. Also, I have plenty of schoolwork to keep busy. Basically instead of homework, this!
> 
> My parents would be so proud. There might actually be more than 22 chapters, but so far 22 is where I'm settling for now.


	6. Chapter 6

The stormtroopers take him to a large empty room every night and every night they rape him. They’ve done this for almost an entire month now. He knows they’re doing this on Ren’s orders and he almost wishes he didn’t know that. 

“After this, I’m going to let the stormtroopers have you.” 

Ren told him that the night in the interrogation room. At first, Poe had tried to act tough, but after the night ten of them raped him one after another, Poe stopped pretending. There’s no point, they are going to fuck him anyway. Tonight was no different than the other nights, one at a time, always in the ass and never in the mouth and all of them finished inside of him. It’s what the officer watching the events says to him after the fact that shocks him.

“Tomorrow you will be brought before Lord Ren for him to decide your fate.”

Poe freezes. What does that mean? The officer watches him carefully, gauging his reaction. 

“What will be he be deciding on specifically?” Poe croaks, voice hoarse from disuse. 

“Whether you live or die. If he lets you live, he will decide if he wants to keep you or not.”

His insides clench as one of the stormtroopers pulls him up by the arm, he can’t let them take him back to his cell. If Ren gets ahold of him...Poe doesn’t even want to imagine. 

They walk through the empty halls back to this cell. A stupid thought comes into his head, but Poe considers following through with it. Taking a deep breath Poe glances over at the stormtrooper. The man is relaxed, not expecting Poe to fight back. On the stormtrooper’s waist, is a blaster. Poe forms a plan as quickly as possible. He remembers this trooper, he always forced Poe to feel pleasure from his rape. 

Without a second thought, Poe throws his full weight into a tackle. The stormtrooper goes down with Poe landing on top. Before the trooper can come to his senses, Poe grabs the blaster and rips the trooper’s helmet off forcefully. Holding the blaster up Poe begins slamming it into the man’s face repeatedly.

At first, the trooper tries to stop him, but soon the man stops struggling quickly. Poe just keeps bashing the butt of the blaster into what was a face a few minutes ago. Poe sobs quietly as he attacks the man. It takes the thought of being found to get Poe moving again. 

Traveling through the halls holding the blood splattered blaster tightly in his hands. Avoiding the patrols is easier than he thought it would be but he knows getting to a ship will be harder. Taking a deep breath, Poe slips into the hallway near the hanger. It takes all of his self-control to not scream when he sees General Hux and Kylo Ren walking down the hall past him. Poe swallows hard, Ren hasn’t seen him yet, he is going to be j- 

Alarms begin blaring abruptly startling Poe. Ren and Hux move down the hall at a rather brisk pace until a nervous looking officer approaches them.

“What do have to report?” Hux snaps when the man opens and closes his mouth a few times. 

“The resistance pilot is missing, sir,” the officer says quietly. 

“What about the stormtrooper assigned to guard him?”

Poe holds his breath.

“He was found dead on the way back to the pilot's cell.” 

Ren turns to Hux and says very calmly, “Once I find him, I’ll make him beg me for death,”

“No need to be dramatic, Ren,” Hux replies. “We both know he is terrified of you. If he saw you he would cower in fear.”

Poe is offended he isn’t cowering, he is merely crouching down in all-consuming terror. Ren turns back to the officer, “How, exactly, did Dameron kill the trooper?”

The officer swallows, “We believe Dameron bashed the trooper skull in with the blaster the trooper was carrying.”

Slowly Poe creeps away as Ren strangles the officer. He makes it to the hanger without being noticed and tries desperately to think of a way out of this when he notices a shuttle preparing to take off. Knowing it's a longshot, Poe waits for the right moment when there is a lull in the number of people around him. Then, without hesitation, he moves quickly into the shuttle. 

This is risky, but Poe has few other options. Luckily, the shuttle lands on a planet allowing him to escape. He has a plan. a terrible plan. It won’t work, but right now it’s the best he has. Now he just needs to find BB-8.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry this chapter took so long to write and is so short! I couldn't figure out how to write it in a way I really liked. That being said, it is important later. I'm going to post chapter seven as soon as I finish editing it *not* next year. Thanks for sticking with this story despite my long absence. I know how disappointing it is when a fanfic suddenly stops updating. It really sucks. I won't do that again without some sort of warning in advance unless it is something really sudden. I don't have any real reason not to post other than homework so please do yell at me if I forget to post for two weeks. I'm a huge procrastinator. 
> 
> Like I mentioned in the Author's note, that I have since deleted, I have almost all of the chapters finished except for


	7. Chapter 7

Her days fall into a routine. Wake up, use the bathroom, get dressed, eat breakfast. Then she gets escorted by two or three stormtroopers to the training room to exercise, then returns to her room to sit and wait for lunch. Eat lunch, then sit in the bathroom staring out at the stars until dinner. Eat dinner, and wait for him to return. Have sex, cry in the shower, go to sleep.

It repeats like this every day. At first, she liked it, it helped distract from what had happened in the interrogation room. But it quickly became monotonous, and she would often find herself replaying it over and over in her head. She did everything she could to not think about it, but she had already counted the stars outside the bathroom window twice and named and renamed all of them at least three times by now, and it isn’t working anymore.

She hasn’t seen Poe since that day. She’s not sure she wants to. Currently, she is sitting on the bathroom floor coming up with new names for the stars. Behind her the door opens and Ren storms in and strides towards her. She notices Hux behind him.

“Where would Dameron go?” he asks obviously extremely angry.

“What do you mean, ‘Where would Dameron go?’” She asks furrows her eyebrow slightly. “Did he escape?”

Hux steps closer and replies, “Yes, now tell us where he is.”

She glances at Ren and asks, “What will you do to him when he is found?”

“It depends on how fast we find him,” Ren interjects as Hux opens his mouth to say something. “If we find him sooner I’ll just kill him. If it takes longer I’ll make his memory of on our time together in the interrogation room seem joyful by comparison.”

She shivers, “Where have you looked?”

Hux answers this time, “We have scoured most of the outer rim territories, and have yet to find anything.”

She begins shaking her head, “How long has he been gone?”

“He escaped yesterday,” Hux responds.

“Why do you expect me to help you?” she shoots back.

Ren steps closer to her, invading her personal space and towering over her. She refuses to back away, but can’t bring herself to look into his mask.

“If you tell us where he is, I will kill him when I find him,” he growls through the mask, then leans in closer to her face and purrs. “If you don’t or if you help him escape when we find him, then I get to do whatever I want to him. I’ll enjoy breaking him like I did you.”

She shivers at his statement and looks up at him. “I don’t think you will keep your word,” she whispers. “Look for BB-8, he might have some information about Poe’s location, and, I don’t know, check planets with ties to the resistance or neutral planets. That’s where he might want to hide BB.”

Ren steps back stares at her a minute and quickly. Hux is already gone when she breaks down.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ARGGGGHH! 
> 
> Another short chapter! Don't worry I have a longer chapter coming up next! I think instead of having a schedule I'll just post the chapter once I finish editing it. I keep finding mistakes and making little tweaks, but if I waited to post a chapter until I was sure I don't have anything else to add, I would never post so I'll try post about every few days. I'm posting this now because it's also short, nothing much happens in this, and I don't want to make you guys wait for this for no reason. I could probably post most of the chapters in one day, but I still need to finish two of them. At this point, I'm kinda stalling. It's been so long since I started writing this I can barely remember what I wanted to do with chapter 22. :\ 
> 
> On a side note, if the ending of the last chapter seemed a bit rushed, it kinda was. I couldn't remember how I wanted that chapter to end. *If* I do rewrite this, that chapter will get a better ending. Thanks for reading this fic, I appreciate all of your comments. If you see any grammatical errors or anything just tell me so I can fix them. But seriously, you guys are the best!


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> At the end of school, I will be moving across the country for about a year coming back and forth to New York and California I will most likely finish posting the story by then but if I don't I just want to give you all a heads up.

Ali is eating lunch when the door suddenly slides open. Ren strolls in casually and sits across from her. She continually glances up at him as she finishes the rest of her meal. The second she swallows the last bite food, he stands, glances back at her, and begins to leave the room. She considers ignoring his subtle command to follow, but stands and walks reluctantly after him anyway. They walk quickly through the halls, twisting and turning until they reach a room with an open door. He steps aside, gestures for her to enter first, and closes the door after them. 

She peers around the room and notices a tarp making little beeping noises. After she looks back at him, he inclines his head, and she carefully pulls the cover off the thing. Staring back at her is BB-8, who upon seeing her begins beeping excitedly. Ali is shocked to see BB here, she didn’t expect them to find him so quickly. Behind her, Ren steps into view of the little droid, and BB begins beeping fearfully and looking back and forth between them. She kneels down next to BB-8 and reaches for the droid.

“What are you doing here BB?” She asks.

A few beeps and she nods, “Where were you?”

More beeps and a chirp, “Where is Poe, do you know?”

A sad beep and she think for a moment, “Did you see him after he escaped?”

Then BB begins speaking rapidly in droid speak, “You were with him for a while? Do you have any clues?”

BB chirps and begins playing a message. 

“If you are watching this, congratulations, you found my droid. If you were looking for this little guy, then you are probably the First Order, or maybe Alise,” Poe pauses a moment and glances to the side, and then continues. “Hopefully the not former, but regardless the Order won’t be able to figure this out,” he gazes directly into the camera. “Ali, I can’t anymore. I don’t want to continue living under their shadow, I… I’m going to find the end of the universe. I wish I could have brought you with me, but I couldn't hope to pry Ren from you. I’m sorry I left you behind. I’m sure you hate me, but I hate myself more for leaving you with that monster.” He looks down at the floor a tear drips down his face. “Please forgive me, because I will never forgive myself. I couldn’t stay,” his voice cracks, and he sobs a little. “I’m not coming back for you, I can’t. I hope you understand.” He looks up again, tears streaking down his face. “Please forgive me.” and the message ends.

A few tears roll down her cheeks, and she whispers, “I forgive you.”

She feels Ren step closer to her until his chest is lightly touching her back. A hand reaches around and grabs her face as it turns her around to face him. “Where is he? Where is Dameron hiding, Alise?” he says her name mockingly, his voice low and angry.

She winces at how tight he grips her face. “No,” she finally chokes out, “I won’t tell you.” 

His grip smoothly slips down to her neck. “I believe you.”

Her mind feels like it is on fire. No, no. This can’t happen, it hurts. More tears stream down her face, and she is screaming. After only a moment, he rips part of the information from her head. His presence in her mind decreases, and he holds up by her throat as her legs buckle.

“What does the code mean?” He asks, daring her to defy him again. 

It takes her a few tries to answer, but she eventually chokes out, “He’s somewhere in the unknown region.”

He drops her on the ground and she sobs quietly.

“Get up,” he commands. 

She pushes herself up and begins stumbling along behind him. He is walking too fast for her to keep up, and after she falls for the second time, he stops and points at a pair of patrolling stormtroopers, “You two, follow me, and make sure she doesn’t slow down.”

He starts his fast pace again and this time when she stumbles the troopers grab her under the arms without breaking stride. They drag her like this until Ren stops in front of a door.  
“Go back to your duties,” he dismisses them with barely a second glance.

They let her go and she falls to the ground. When she tries to get up, an invisible force keeps her on the floor. He lets out a sigh and stares down at her. He turns her over with the toe of his boot and crouches down by her head. The painful burning sensation in her mind returns to a much lesser degree, but she still whimpers quietly. She shuts her eyes as he searches through her memories and thoughts from the past month. Every name she gave the stars, every meal she ate in silence, every lonely moment. A hand gently strokes her hair.

“Why do you still fight me? If you just gave in I wouldn’t have to hurt you,” he whispers. “I know you don’t like pain, so why do you cause yourself so much? You try to protect people who left you for dead. Even now you resist me. This only hurts if you fight it.” 

He continues to pet her hair. She keeps her eyes closed, even though she feels him leave her mind completely.

“Open your eyes,” he says as gently as he can with the mask distorting his voice.

She wants to keep fighting him, wants to run away and never be found ever again. But she can’t, if she runs he will not rest until he has found her. She wants to be free, but that is impossible, she’ll live life always looking over her shoulder. That’s not free. So she opens her eyes. Something about the action feels final like she was at the edge of a black hole, and she just fell past the event horizon. He continues stroking her hair. 

“Are you done?” he asks lightly.

She gazes up at him. Is she done? Does she want to give up? Is she ready to commit to this? To him? She stares a moment longer and looks away. He stands, pulling her up with him, he picks her up and enters the door. The door shuts behind them, and he places her on the bed. Removing his mask he sits behind her. He wraps his arms around her and holds her close. He hums quietly and begins stroking her hair again. Even if she isn’t free, and even if she is a slave to him, she still enjoys his gentler side. Closing her eyes, she leans back into his embrace and eventually falls asleep. 

She dreams of flying and wakes up screaming.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm posting a lot because I have a break, expect me to post less often after Monday.  
> Thanks for reading! Tell me if you see any errors or just your opinion on my writing so far. Have an alright day!


	9. Chapter 9

She sits at the table across from Ren. He watches her as she draws nothing in particular. He stares into her face intently, waiting. She breathes out heavily through her nose and puts her stylus down. 

“I don’t know what you want,” she whispers staring down at her doodles. 

Ren stays uncharacteristically silent, and she glances up to see the anger burning in his eyes. Instantly, she wishes she hadn’t opened her mouth. He leans forward slowly, stands up, and begins walking around the table to her. Scrambling up, she tries to retreat into the bathroom. He stops her mid-step. 

“Where are you going, Ali?” his tone dangerously low.

Upon hearing his voice her only thought is, Oh fuck. He stalks closer to her and releases her from the force. Before she can run her grabs her arm and pulls her back and turns her around. Shit, shit, shit.

“You told him we were coming,” his tone telling Ali he is dangerously close to strangling her. “I don’t know how, but know that when we find him again, everything that happens to him will be your fault. Where did you send him?”

It is pointless to lie or not tell him, he can just rip it from her mind. Which brings up the question of why he even asked. Then it hits her. He’s testing her, seeing if she will betray him again. He growls impatiently, and she knows what comes next.

“Wait! I sent him to Corellia!” she exclaims desperately, and she feels him enter her thoughts, but she doesn’t try resist. 

The anger in his eyes decreases but is still present. He brushes his lips against her ear, and whispers, “You are still in trouble, but I’ll let you rest tonight.” 

She relaxes considerably, she is glad she managed to avoid being raped or tortured tonight. “Thank you,” she whispers.

He pulls away and leaves her standing there. She doesn’t move for a minute until she feels the urge to pee and enters the bathroom. As she sits on the toilet she looks out at the stars. After she finishes, pulls her clothes off, and turns on the bath. She stands there shivering for a minute while the bath fills. She slips into the water and continues to look out the window. A few minutes later the familiar vortex of hyperspace stops her stargazing. She closes her eyes and sinks into the water. When she resurfaces, she realizes that someone is in the room with her. That someone is Poe. 

“What the hell are you doing here?” she gasps.

Poe just stares at her.

“You’re not really here,” she says and closes her eyes. “You can’t be here.” 

“I am here Alise,” he says, “I came back for you.”

She shakes her head, “You need to leave when Ren comes back he’ll do worse to you than before.”

“Come with me,” Poe begs. “We can run far away from the First Order, from Ren. We’ll get away from all of this! Together we can be free!”

She gazes at him warily, “The Resistance is close to destruction and the New Republic is in shambles, tell me, Poe, wherein the galaxy is this safe place you speak about so passionately. He’ll never leave us alone. One day we’ll be caught off guard, or we’ll slip up and we’ll be back where we started, only this time Ren won’t be gentle," then almost quietly, "he is kind to me sometimes, you know.”

Poe shakes his head, “The Resistance isn’t gone! As long as there are people who want freedom, the Resistance will live!” Poe’s tone turns pleading. “Come with me. He doesn’t care about you. He is only using you.”

“What happens when people forget what freedom feels like? When they stop caring about being free?” she asks quietly.

He looks shocked and stares at her, “You don’t want to escape, do you?”

“Even if we got away, we wouldn’t be free,” she responds, then looks down, staring into the water. “I don’t want to leave. You’re right, I don’t want to be free. Not your kind of freedom. I want to stay, not because I’m forced to, but because I feel…safe. He makes me feel…”

She looks up at Poe. His expression is that of barely concealed disgust. “What? What does he make you feel? Love? Happiness? What could possibly make you want to stay?”

She turns her head away, her tears making little ripples in the bath water. “I feel secure. He makes me feel…like I matter. I didn’t matter that much to the resistance. They left me here for dead. I don’t matter that much to you. You left me here without so much as a goodbye. I forgave you, but that doesn’t change the fact that I am alone here. I don’t blame you for wanting to leave.”

The look he gives her is pure disgust. “Are you going to tell him I was here? Eager to please your master. I should have never come back.”

“You should leave,” she whispers quietly. 

He turns and starts to walk out of the bathroom. He stops and looks back, “Do you love him?” he asks softly. 

Does she love him? A moment of deliberation before answering, “I…I think…I don’t know.”

She could have sworn she caught a glimpse of Poe’s lips turn down into a frown as he exits the room. Shaking her head she wakes up from her daydream. It confuses her but she pushes it from her mind. She stays in the tub until the water becomes lukewarm, and she steps out. The view out of the window is still blurred by hyperspace. Drying herself off, she returns to the bedroom to put on some clothes. A thought enters her mind. She considers it a moment before knocking on the door. She steps back as a stormtrooper steps in.

“What do you want?” he asks.

“I need to speak to Kylo Ren,” she answers and hopes he concedes to her request.

There is a long second where he stares at her, and then turns motioning her to follow. Another two walk a little behind her on either side. A minute into the walk she begins to regret her decision. What if he flips out and she gets in even more trouble? Before she can think about it more, they arrive at the bridge. Standing in front of her is Hux, his back is turned. The stormtrooper that had led her there says something and he turns around. He looks a bit surprised and annoyed at her appearance, and asks, “What are you doing here?” 

She takes a moment to collect her thoughts, “I need to speak to Ren. Is he here?”

“What do you want to talk about?” Ren hisses into her ear.

She jumps and turns around mid-air. “How long were you standing there?”

“I asked you a question,” he replies coolly.

“Poe is probably hiding in or near my old home,” she says. 

“Your old home,” Hux question, “where is it?”

“It’s nearly touching the old rebel base,” she answers. 

“He can’t be there, we have stormtroopers posted at that location,” Hux says, tone very annoyed. “Do you have any useful information?”

“It’s on the northern side. It was abandoned when the rebellion pulled out of the planet. The Resistance made a new one instead of returning to the old one,” she says. “They were worried you would have some people on the planet.”

"How do we know you aren’t lying?" Hux asks accusingly.

She shakes her head, "If I was lying, Ren probably would have sent me out of the airlock, after murdering me. Clearly, I’m not dead, and very much alive, so you have nothing to worry about."

He looks at her a moment longer, then, "Why are you telling us this?"

She looks back at Ren, asking him quietly, 'please give him some time to heal?'

‘From what?’ Ren asks quietly in her mind.

'His injuries that he received from his capture.'

Ren hum noncommittally and Hux looks confused.

'What do you want?'

‘You know what. Or did you want me to say out loud?’ he replies casually.

‘Fine, as long as he is at the minimum able to walk, talk, use both arms, and eat.’

“Deal,” Ren says and turns to leave while Hux looks annoyed, confused and exasperated.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What? I actually might start updating regularly?!?! *knock on wood*
> 
> I still haven't finished chapter 13 or 22 .__. (E N D M E)  
> Here's hoping I actually finish them before June...


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Honestly, the story goes downhill for the characters from here on out. Also, I can mention some of the more triggering aspects of the chapters from here on out if you'd all like that.

Poe notices the cool air on his skin. His clothes are gone. He is lying on his back with his eyes closed. The ground is cool, hard, and smooth, and something warm and fleshy rubs against his thigh. His brain is sending him warning signals, but he can’t bring himself to care. A pair of hands with long thin fingers slide down his stomach to his thighs. He feels vague recognition and worry, but can’t quite place from where. The finger that pushes its way into his hole is cold and is bigger than he expected, not uncomfortably so, but enough to make him gasp. 

Poe feels the finger begin to slowly move in and rub rhythmically inside him. A few gentle strokes later, and the tip of the digit brushes against a sensitive spot inside of him. He moans breathily. Without breaking rhythm, a second finger slips in and is angled to hit Poe’s prostate. He arches his back and moans loudly his dick hardening. A low chuckle cuts through his hazy euphoria. He knows that voice. 

“You seem to be enjoying yourself,”

He freezes. It’s Ren’s voice. 

Instantly his eyes snap open and he begins to try pushing himself away from the other man, away from the intruding digits. He doesn’t get far before he is frozen in place by Ren. Poe stares up at the other man. He feels another finger slide in, and he feels like vomiting. He feels a nervous knot form in his stomach. Anywhere would be better than here. Poe closes his eyes as he feels tears run down the side of his face.

“Please... just... let me go...” Poe begs.

Inside of him, the digits spread out, stretching him further. 

“Why would I do that, when you are enjoying yourself so much?” Ren asks.

“No I... please stop, I don’t…” Poe sobs.

Another digit enters him, and he feels the force release him. 

“No, no, stop!” Poe shouts as Ren spreads the four fingers.

He feels Ren shift, and he a gentle kisses slowly trailing up his body. Poe squirms under the unwanted care. 

“Do you prefer it when I'm rough?” Ren whispers quietly, threat hanging in the air.

Poe shakes his head. 

“Use your words, Dameron,” Ren says, annoyed.

“No,” Poe answers.

“‘No’ what, Dameron, tell me what you want,” Ren orders, voice light, but he is clearly getting impatient.

“No, I... I want you to be gentle,” Poe forces out. 

“I wonder,” Ren begins with a tone that would be comforting anywhere else, but here it just terrifies Poe more, “if you can take my whole hand.” 

Poe locks eyes with Ren and tries to kick the other man away. 

“No, you don’t think so?” Ren asks.

Poe nods as more tears spill down his face. The intruding fingers aren’t extremely painful, but Poe would rather not have Kylo Ren’s hand inside of him. No, Poe would rather not have any part of Ren in him. 

“It's either this or you get to eat my cum,” Ren states.

Poe shivers and shakes his head.

“Speak, Dameron,” Ren says angrily.

“I... I want... your…” Poe sobs. 

“What do you want, tell me,” Ren whispers.

“I want... your hand…” Poe chokes out.

Ren sits up and smiles triumphantly, and a fifth digit enters him. Closing his eyes, Poe breathes out sharply. He feels the hand sink deeper within him. He feels the urge to throw up again. A few seconds later and the hand is pulled out, only to be replaced with Ren’s dick. Poe feels his prostate being hit with every thrust. He writhes and moans, his own dick hardening painfully. A hand wraps around his member and moves in time with the thrusts. It doesn’t take long for him to finish. Ren laughs quietly and kisses Poe gently on the lips. 

Poe turns his head, disgusted, and ashamed. Feels little pecks sprinkled all over his neck. He feels the, unfortunately, familiar sensation of Ren finishing deep inside of him. Ren’s dick is pulled out of him, and he feels liquid dripping out of him. He refuses to think about it. If he does he knows from experience that he’ll hurl. A hand begins gently stroking his hair, and an arm pulls him into Ren’s lap. He weakly tries to get away, afraid of what else Ren will do to him.

Ren whispers softly into his ear. “Wake up, Poe, I’ll find you soon.”

Poe shoots up in a cold sweat, gasping and sobbing. He pulls his legs up to his chest. Every night he has the same dream. What happens in the dream changes from night to night. Sometimes he relives his rape, other times his mind conjures up new situations, but no matter what happens in the dream it always ends with Ren telling him, “Wake up, Poe, I’ll be with you soon.” or some variation of that phrase. 

He feels his stomach turn and it is as if his jaw loosens on instinct. Without hesitating, Poe scrambles out of the bed, stumbles into the bathroom, and vomits into the toilet. He doesn’t always throw up, but he is used to this. Once he finishes he rinses his mouth out and turns on the shower. He used to fight more in his dreams, but it slowly wore down on him, now he mostly just lies complacently waiting for it to end. He steps into the shower and just lets the water run down his body. Someday soon the First Order is going to find him. It’s not something that he will lie to himself about, it won’t do any good anyway. He takes comfort in the fact that the Order doesn't know where he is.

Yet. 

Hopefully. 

He turns the water off, grabs a towel, and dries himself off. After pulling on his clothes, Poe steps outside, and a chill runs down his spine. He has a bad feel about today, he can’t place why. Brushing it off as just the morning chill, he walks away from the building and moves towards the spaceport. Maybe he can get some news about the Resistance, or where the Order’s presence is most heavily concentrated or maybe even about Alise. He doesn’t hope too much about that last one, but maybe just maybe, she escaped. 

When Poe arrives it is a busy as ever, and he steps into a cantina. The conversations in the small building are nervous, and everyone keeps glancing at the doorway. Poe walks to the bar and orders a drink. It takes him a minute but he finds a good booth to sit in. From here he can see the entrance, but can’t be easily seen. Soon a man he recognizes steps into the cantina and looks around. Poe signals him, and the man walks to him.

“What news do you have for me?” Poe asks in a hushed tone. 

The other man glances around before whispering, “The First Order is here.”

Poe feels his insides tighten.

“They are here in search of something. They are looking from here all the way to the other side of the planet.” The man focuses on Poe. “They came this morning. The Finalizer is currently in orbit over the planet. Rumors say that even Kylo Ren is on the surface. I don’t know anything else at the moment, but you should hide, Poe. Even if they don’t know you are here they could still find you.” 

Poe nods, “Thank you Snap. I’m sorry about everything.”

Snap nods and stands to leave. “I could smuggle you off of the planet.”

Poe shakes his head, “I couldn’t live with myself if the First Order captured you because of me.”

“Good luck, and may the force be with you,” Snap says, and leaves.

Poe sits at the table for a minute longer and finishes his drink. He leaves money on the counter and walks out. In the distance, stormtroopers are gathered, stopping people and questioning them. He tries not to act suspicious, and as casually as he can manage, he walks away from the cantina. 

“You there stop!” 

He stops dead in his tracks. One of the stormtroopers in the spaceport recognized him. He kicks himself for being so stupid. Instead of panicking, he rests a hand on his blaster, as a different hand turns him around roughly. Coming face to face with a stormtrooper, he shoots. The other trooper tries to blast him, but Poe beats him to it. By the time the second stormtrooper hits the ground, the other stormtroopers come running at him as well as their reinforcements. Everyone is starting to stare at him. The other stormtroopers start shooting at him as one of them stays behind to call in even more reinforcements. Poe decides, after careful (two seconds of) consideration, that turning heel and sprinting away would be pragmatic. So much for not acting suspiciously. 

He knows he is going to have to lose the stormtroopers on his tail. As he runs, he scans his surroundings. He spots a back alley and takes a sharp right to ducks into it. The troopers rush past his hiding space and continue down the street. He makes his way slowly back to his house, avoiding anyone or anything that might be even remotely First Order affiliated. Finally, after a few close calls, he is back home. 

Something makes him not want to enter the house, tells him to run, but he can’t. The First Order is all over the planet. If he did manage to escape, he would just be tracked to whatever system he decides to hide in with ease. He slips inside the building and sits on one of the chairs in the dining room. He needs to leave the planet as soon as possible. It's only a matter of time before someone realizes who he is. That is, of course, assuming they don't know he is here already. 

Above him, there is movement, a deliberate footstep. 

His stomach knots and he knows someone is in his bedroom. A silent moment of deliberation and he stands up. Quietly walking up the stairs, he holds his breath. At the top of the steps, he walks cautiously towards the bedroom. The door is closed, but Poe remembers leaving it open. A quiet rustling from the other side of the door confirms his suspicion, someone is in his room. 

As he approaches the sounds stop. Right before he can get to the door, it slides open. He freezes in place. He feels the urge to throw up, to run as fast as he can, to get away, to do anything. Kylo Ren is sitting on his bed, staring at him. While he can’t see Ren's face, he feels the way Ren’s eyes are boring into him. Poe starts to back away but doesn’t make it far before falling on his hands and knees, vomiting on the floor. This can't be real. He sees the bottom of Ren’s robes come into view. 

“Hello again, Dameron,” Ren breaks the silence, the triumph in his voice manages to get translated through the vocoder in Ren’s mask. “You couldn’t run from me forever.”

Poe doesn’t move, and he doesn’t speak. Anything he says now will probably get him into deeper shit.

“Three whole months, that’s how long it took to find you,” Ren walks around behind him and kicks him in the side sending him flying into the wall. Poe lands heavily on his side, and he hears a sickening pop accompanied by pain in his right hip. Ren strides towards him, as he struggles to move away. A strong hand grabs a chunk of his hair and drags him up to look at him in the face. 

“You shouldn’t have run,” Ren whispers though it sounds more like a growl through the mask. “I’m going to make you wish you hadn’t tried to escape from me.”

“Just let me go, I can’t do anything to harm the First Order,” Poe pleads.

“Why would I do that? You enjoyed yourself so thoroughly the first time we were together.” Ren purrs.

Poe tries to shake his head, “No,” He whispers almost begging. “Please just let me go. I just want to live.” 

“But your friend wants you back, Dameron,” satisfaction oozing through Ren’s mask. “She told us where you were. I didn’t make her tell us you were in her old home.”

Poe gasps. No, it can’t be true, she would never betray him like that, Ren forced her to. She wouldn’t do that, Ali isn’t like that. A few hot tears roll down his cheeks, and Ren lets him go. He is barely aware as two stormtroopers drag him out of the house, and into a waiting ship. 

His thoughts are elsewhere. Why would she tell him that? What made her want to do that? Was it because he left without her? She didn’t seem angry when she told him the First Order was coming or when she told him about her house. What had changed in that one week? 

He doesn’t notice he is on the Finalizer until a medic pops his dislocated hip back in place. He screams in pain and curses. They tell him not to move or put weight on his hip for a few weeks. Shortly there after a painless sleep drags him under.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, fuck me. I haven't posted in over a month. I literally just got an internet connection last night so I couldn't update this until just now. I ended up moving a month early to NYC because I passed the CHSPE. It was a combination of Pneumonia, BotW, studying statistics for the CHSPE (which in the end I didn't fucking need) and moving/not having internet. On the bright side, I have basically nothing stopping me from updating this aside from needing to finish the illustrations for my children's book. Also needing to actually write the book I started as a ten-year-old. I am now just going to forego an actual schedule and just update this as I go. Chapter eleven should be up today as well, but I changed something from chapter ten that directly affects chapter eleven in a big way so it'll take me a while to rewrite the bits I need to so that everything actually makes sense. I hope I didn't make anyone think I'm giving up on this. I'm pretty stubborn and I refuse to let this go unfinished.


	11. Chapter 11

He is walking in the desert, surrounded by sand dunes. The sun burns down with a harsh glare. In his hands is a small knife, it’s razor sharp. He looks up, and see a sandstorm rolling in the distance. He turns and starts to run. After only a few steps he stumbles falls into the sand. He tries to stand and keep running but is quickly overcome by the storm. He looks up to see Kylo Ren standing over him. He takes the knife in his hand stabs himself with it. 

His opens his eyes and almost immediately focuses on the other person in the room. Alise. She doesn’t make eye contact with him, instead, she studies the floor very intently. He stares at her, then asks, “Did you tell him where I was?”

Her eyes stay glued to the ground as she nods.

“Why?” his voice cracks.

“He would have found you anyway, someday. After you escaped, he said ‘I will enjoy breaking him like you,’ or something like that. But only if I didn’t tell him where you were, or if I warned you about them coming. He said he would kill you if I cooperate.”

Poe blanches at her words. She finally looks at him, her eyes shining. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have come.”

Poe watches her stand and almost run out of the med bay. He wants to call her back, to try to understand her, yell at her until his head stops hurting with the weight of everything that happened, but he doesn’t. He can’t. Just sits quietly as she hurries away. He sits impatiently and waits. For what, he isn’t entirely sure. Time doesn’t have much of a meaning to him at the moment, but he can swear that hours pass before a nurse arrives and sedates him. 

The darkness of unconsciousness envelops him like an icy gust of air. it practically knocks the air out of him. A seemingly innumerable amount of time passes before distant memories start to surface. 

His childhood, his adolescence, his adulthood, the Resistance, then his capture. More painful memories rise to the forefront of his thoughts. The confusion as he is personally escorted by Ren to the interrogation chamber. Further bewilderment when he sees Ali. The shock and panic that overtakes him once he realizes Ren’s intentions with him. The pain and humiliation as he is raped in front of his friend, by his enemy. The fear and determination as he makes his escape. The dreams he had after his escape. He feels the haze of the sedative slowly wearing off and he regains consciousness. He barely has time to register the man at the end of his bed before he says, “You did miss me, Dameron.”

Poe stares at Ren for a moment before sitting up as straight as possible and shaking his no. He feels like someone set his mind on fire, but he can’t scream, and he can’t move. The memories of his dreams, all of them, are brought up. They keep coming, even after he throws up the empty contents of his stomach over the edge of the bed. When they finally stop, Poe is curled into a ball. 

“Don’t lie to me, I can take the truth right out your mind,” Ren hisses. “I don’t have to let you heal, but I agreed to leave you alone until you have healed enough to walk properly. You should be thanking your friend. She is the only reason you were allowed in here.”

“What did she do, suck your dick?” Poe whispers. “Whatever it is I don’t want her doing it for me.”

Ren tilts his head to the side, Poe really wishes he would stop wearing that mask. 

“Would you rather I not let you heal? Do you want me to just get on with it?” Ren asks softly, though through the mask it sounds more ominous. “If so I can take you right here.”

Poe swallows and tries to answer, but is beat to it, “You made a deal with me.” Ali storms in; she looks livid. “What the hell are you doing Poe? You know how hard it was to convince him to leave you alone! Now you’re trying to squander it! I don’t understand you, what is wrong with you?” she turns to Ren. “Please, take off your mask.”

He reaches up and removes the helmet obscuring his face. There is the slightest smile on his face when looks down at her. She stands on her tiptoes and whispers something in his ear. He pauses a moment whispers something to her, and gently brushes his lips against her’s. A long moment passes before she says yes. Ren stands up straight. He gazes down at her with a predatory look in his eyes, before he replaces his mask. “One hour,” is the last thing he says to them before he leaves. 

Poe stares at her. “What did you just agree to do?”

“It’s not important right now,” she answers quickly. 

“Tell me what he wants you to do,” Poe says to her with a questioning look.

“It’s nothing too bad,” she says quietly. “Let’s talk about something else.”

“I need to know what you just did that is worth an hour of time to him,” Poe stares her down. “What did he ask you to do?” 

“Why does this matter so much to you?” she asks, close to tears.

“Just please, tell me I want to know what you are doing for me,” Poe replies quickly.

She looks him right in the face. Her eyes are duller than before, and they have a slightly glassy quality. The time she has spent here has worn down on her, more than she probably tries to let on. 

“I agreed to give him a blowjob,” she responds calmly. “Like I said nothing big.”

Poe stares at her and does a mental double take. What the hell? Was he actually right? This isn’t anything like what she normally does. She might not notice it, but Ren is right, she is cracking. He might even think she is broken, if not for the almost irritating edge to her voice, one that everyone with annoyingly stubborn determination has. There is still hope for her.

“You would have never done something like that before,” Poe comments. “You also wouldn’t have let anyone, especially not Ren, come that close to you. You’ve changed, and not for the better. He has you in the palm of his hand. I know a little bit of the old you still in there. Just run, hide, leave me here. He might kill me eventually, but you, he likes you, you’re his pet. No one, not even Ren, wants to kill their pet. You will be alive here longer than me if you stay. Ali, I know you don’t want to leave me behind, but I can handle myself. If not for yourself, do it for me. Please just go.”

She stares at him blankly then drops her gaze as she responds, “I can’t do that. He trusts me and is kind to me. If I even try to leave now,” her voice cracks, “he’ll hurt me again. He might hurt you again too. I can’t let that happen to you, and I don’t want to be back where I started. I can’t go back to before. You have to understand.”

Poe just watches her from the bed. At first, he has nothing to say, but the next words he utters he means wholeheartedly. “I don’t want to talk to Ren’s pet, I want to speak to Ali.”

She barely misses a beat, “Ali wouldn’t leave a friend to be tortured and raped until his captor loses interest, but she also wouldn’t have freely given the location of said friend, to said captor, to do said things. I’m going to kill you.”

Poe’s mouth pops open and he can’t get himself to talk.

“If you aren’t alive he can’t have you. You’ll be safe. That’s why I told him. So I could end your suffering,” her expression vaguely unhinged. “I don’t want you to have to live in fear.”

She takes a step forward, “STOP!” Poe basically yells at her. Freezing mid-stride, she stares at him. “What the hell is wrong with you? You need to calm down.”

A stormtrooper steps in and strides over to them. “What is the problem here?” he demands.

Poe glances at her, and she looks terrified as she shakes her head. 

“Nothing, we were arguing over something stupid.”

The trooper looks at him for a long moment then turns, and exits.

“What was that look for?” Poe asks more calmly but still moments from jumping out of bed and attempting to run. 

“If Ren finds out what I tried to do he might punish me for it.”

“He reads your thoughts all the time, he’ll find out sooner or later. No point in hiding it. Maybe he’ll even let you suck his dick as an apology,” Poe hisses out angrily.

Her eyes start to water, and she blinks back tears. “I wish he didn’t want me as much as he did. I wish he hadn’t kept me alive,” she whispers miserably.

Poe hates seeing people cry. “I’m sorry that was out of line. I should have kept my mouth shut. It wasn’t my intention to make you upset,” his voice thick and he feels a tear or two starts to form. She shakes her head and looks away. 

“I’m sorry too. I shouldn’t have let him know where you were. We both fucked up, in different ways, and to different degrees. Me quite a bit more than you”

He nods. They stay that way for the rest of the hour, sitting not talking just staying together. Sooner than either of them are happy about, a pair of stormtroopers march Alise out the door, and in a moment they are gone. He doesn’t remember falling asleep, but when he wakes up, a nurse speaks to him a moment, and he is put under again. This happens for a while until he is allowed to walk again. He has a week left to heal and is told, forced, to walk the length of the med bay every day. Finally, His last day arrives and with it his first real visitor in over a week. Ren stands with a medical officer. They are clearly discussing something. 

As Poe walks past, Ren turns his head in Poe’s direction, watching him pass, before declaring loud enough for Poe to hear, “He is capable of walking fine. There is no need for an extended stay.” Poe halts and twists around to see the medical officer nodding and scurrying away to do other work. There is a moment where they just stare at each other. Ren is then quickly striding towards him. 

He briefly contemplates running but decides not to piss Ren off more. He is ready for that.

Ren stops a foot away from Poe. Nothing is said for a long moment. Breaking the silence Ren calmly whispers, “All that work just to be back here again. To be my ‘pet’ as you called your friend,” he pauses, then his voice lowers. “Was it worth it, Dameron?”

Poe doesn’t answer, and he feels his stomach clench. 

Ren continues unperturbed by Poe’s silence. “I wasn’t going to continue down this path with you, but you forced my hand, you and your friend,” he begins to circle Poe. “You dreamed about it. Though that wasn’t your only dream, you imagined different things too, things I had never done. You want this don’t, you?”

Poe feels the urge to vomit grow with each passing word. He shakes his head rapidly.

“No? Don't you want this? Then why did you enjoy yourself so thoroughly? Why did you cum every night?” Ren stops in front of him. “Why did you, Dameron?”

Poe turns away, trying with all of his might to keep the contents of his stomach from crawling back up his throat. 

“Imagine if your friends at the Resistance saw how aroused you were by me fucking you. I’m sure your other friend would love to know. What was his name again?” Ren looks at him, “Ahh yes, Temmin, I believe?” 

Poe doesn’t breath. No, he’s lying, they can’t have Snap. 

“Do you want to see him?” Ren hisses the question into Poe’s ear. “I can arrange a meeting between you two. Though you might not like my terms.”

Poe turns to face Ren again. He looks pleadingly up at the masked monster.

“What do you want from me?” Poe asks brokenly. 

“If I allow you to meet him, you have to choose between sucking my cock or bending over letting me feel you again. It's been a while," Ren purrs as he runs a hand down Poe's back. Poe suppresses a shiver at the thought. "After I will let you speak to him for ten minutes.”

Poe knew there would be a catch. He doesn’t like either option. 

“Make you choice fast, he’s scheduled for execution.”

“The first option,” he whispers. He reasons that he doesn’t want to be spreading his legs for Ren if he can avoid it. 

“What is that? I can’t seem to remember.”

Poe swallows thickly and whispers, “I want to suck your dick instead of letting you fuck me, you monster.”

Ren stands there, genuinely stunned, then commands, “Come.” 

With that, he turns and starts walking. 

Poe is stuck to the spot for a moment. He just agreed to suck Ren off, and for what? Ten minutes to talk to his friend. He's already regretting this decision.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I should rewrite this story eventually. Not now, if I do then I will definitely never finish updating. Frankly, this chapter and a few others are in desperate need of rewrites, but as of now, I don't know if I have the motivation. I'm still a fan of Star Wars, but my main focus fandom wise is shifting to more AoT/SNK fanfiction and fanart. I do have a couple other ideas for SW fanfiction that I may or may not post in the future and once The Last Jedi comes out, I might be inspired to write more SW fanfics, but for now, I'll probably be focusing mostly on AoT/SNK works. That being said, I'm holding out on posting any of those so I can focus in on this story for everyone reading this. For the foreseeable future, I will only be posting this. I know me, if I post other fanfics, this will fall even more by the wayside. Anyway, hope you all have a good week. I know school is almost over for most of you and I just want to wish you all good luck and good grades!
> 
> Also, side note, please inform me of any awkward sentences or little mistakes so I can fix them. I've read and reread this so many times and I keep finding mistakes which, I'm sure, are annoying to read for both of us. :P


	12. Chapter 12

The door opens, and Poe is shoved inside almost right into Snap. Snap gasps in surprise and looks up, eyes widening slightly. Poe tries to back up but is stopped by a hard pair of legs. Fingers wrap in his hair and he is jerked up to a standing position. 

“Dameron here asked to give me a blowjob. In reward he gets ten minutes with you,” Ren pulls on Poe’s hair a little harder, and growls in his ear, “Open your eyes, slut.”  
Snap starts to talk, but Ren’s free hand reaches forward and he is frozen in place, unable to speak. Poe whimpers quietly because of the tight grip on his hair, and he is dropped. Poe falls onto his hands and knees, and Ren steps around him a stands in front of him. Poe doesn’t want to think about what he agreed to do. Ren slowly undoes his clothes until he produces his semi-hard member. 

Poe looks down, he can’t look at Ren’s dick. A finger pries open Poe’s mouth, and Ren rests the head of his dick on Poe’s lips. Poe closes his eyes. 

“If you don’t open your eyes, I’ll have your friend take your place, and If you even think about biting me, I’ll make you suffer.”

Poe opens his eyes and glances over at Snap. The look on his friend’s face makes Poe wish Ren would just kill him already. He feels the intruding member push against his mouth. Poe keeps his lips tightly closed. A hand grips tightly around his throat makes it hard to breathe, and Poe involuntarily opens his mouth to gasp for air. The tip of Ren’s cock is pushed inside. Poe feels the rest of Ren’s shaft being pushed into his mouth. When the tip brushes the back of his throat, Poe gags, the urge to vomit returns. 

Poe looks up at Ren, the monster’s gaze isn’t focused on him, but his friend. All of a sudden Poe’s head jerked all the way down to the base of Ren’s cock, causing him to feel his stomach lurch. He struggles to move his head away so he can breathe, but the grip Ren has on is him is like iron. Poe stops moving, maybe he can die of asphyxiation. He is released, and he forces himself to choke back the bile rising in his throat. Something tells him throwing up on Ren, as satisfying as it would be, would make things worse for him. 

Ren shoves himself back into Poe’s throat and continues the cycle until he finally cums in Poe’s mouth. He wants to spit out the foul tasting cum in his mouth, but fingers clamp his mouth shut waiting for him to swallow the load in his mouth. 

“Come here, Dameron,” Ren says calmly.

Poe looks back up at Ren, and he slowly crawls back to the feet of his captor. Ren stands over him, “Look how weak you are,” Ren’s dick is tucked away again. He crouches in front of Poe. “You are so insignificant, so weak, and yet, the Resistance loves you. Why do you think that is, Dameron?”

Ren is quiet, he seems to want Poe to answer. 

“I don’t know,” Poe answers after a long stretch of silence. 

“Birds of a feather, flock together,” is all Ren says before leaving the room.

Poe dreads turning around, and he jumps when a hand rests on his shoulder. Snap pulls him up gently and looks at him with pity.

“I...I didn’t realize how...fucked up it really is until now,” Snap whispers. “I’m sorry.”

Poe looks up at him. When he had finally broken down in front of Snap and told him everything that had happened on the Finalizer and about his dreams up until then Snap had been sympathetic.  
Poe looks away and replies, “It’s alright Snap I’m fine.”

“For how long, Poe? He’s not just going to stop, he obviously loves tormenting you,” Snap gazes at Poe sadly. “What did you want to talk about?”

“He has Alise, and she is eating out of the palm of his hand. She is too afraid to run and is agreeing to things like sucking his dick, in exchange for an hour with me. She isn’t helping me by hurting herself. How do I change her mind?”

“Firstly you made the same deal as well except for less time, secondly he is keeping you both alive so the other will stay. If he killed her, you would try to leave, and if he killed you, she might try leave. He is using you two against each other. You wouldn’t let your friend stay here alone, and she wouldn’t either. She probably has already tried to do something to get you away from Ren, and you clearly have asked her to leave. She won’t leave without you, you need to get away with her. Drag her away if need be, but remember, don’t be stupid about it. Hide in a neutral system first then a First Order system. Separate up, don’t tell each other where you are, also shun the Resistance and the New Republic. They can’t help you anymore.”  
Poe nods dejectedly “The New Republic is gone, isn’t it?” Poe asks. Before Snap can say anything, the door opens and cuts off his words.

“Was it worth it, Dameron?” Ren asks with the slightest hint of smugness. 

Poe turns and stares at the masked monster. He doesn’t reply, instead, he steps up to Ren with his head bowed. The long silence is measured with the somewhat ragged breathing of Snap. 

“Lucky for you, your execution has been delayed until tomorrow. You get to spend more time with Hux,” Ren addresses Snap in a casual manner. “Unless you would prefer my talents?”  
Snap stops breathing for a second.

“I would rather have the general. I prefer gingers over the dark, and mysterious types anyway.” 

“The Resistance sure loves the witty ones, don’t they?” Ren chuckles darkly.

Snap stiffens suddenly and doesn’t move for a few seconds. His jaw drops, and glances between Poe and Ren. His mouth opens and he tries to speak but instead screams in pain. A couple of seconds of ear shattering screams from Snap, then silence. Ren turns and leaves Snap on the ground. Poe stares down at his friend. Snap had passed out from Ren mind probe.

“Dameron,” Ren’s mechanical voice cuts through Poe’s thoughts, “come here.”

Poe spins around and stands there a moment. He doesn’t push his luck too far and cautiously approaches the man. He stops a foot away from Ren. Without a word, Ren turns and walks down the corridor. Poe doesn’t hesitate to follow. Behind him, the door slams shut. They walk down the halls, and a thought strikes him since there are no stormtroopers following them he could try to run. Ren chuckles and keeps walking. 

“Go ahead and try, Dameron,” Ren says in a daring tone. “I like a challenge, it’s more entertaining.”

Poe refuses to think too deeply into Kylo Ren’s words, it’s not a mental path he wants to go down. They continue to wherever Ren is leading him. After at least a hundred confusing twists and turns later, they arrive at a door. Ren opens the door and faces Poe. Poe stands there waiting for something. 

“Enter,” Ren orders, and gestures into the room.

Poe swallows and edges around Ren. The room is mostly empty, except for a small bed in the corner. He carefully walks over to the bed. 

“Why am I here?” Poe asks.

Ren doesn’t reply, and Poe turns around. He's gone and the door is most assuredly locked. Poe breathes in deeply and sits heavily on the bed. The mattress is surprisingly comfortable, not like a normal mattress, but more comfortable than he expected. 

Looking around, the rest of the room is empty, except for a second door. The lights in the room are dim and he blinks back tiredness. If he falls asleep now who knows what will happen. He forces his eyes to stay open, and he stands to inspect the door further. He tries to open it and is pleasantly surprised when it opens to reveal a refresher. The memory of sucking Ren’s dick shoves its way into his thoughts suddenly, and he has the urge to rinse his mouth out. Thoroughly. 

Instead, he opts for a shower and a thorough scrubbing of his teeth and gums. Maybe even his tongue and the back of his throat. Turning the water on as cold as it goes, he removes his clothing after shutting the door. He steps into the freezing blast of water, a shiver runs through him. After a moment he turns the water temperature up a bit. 

He stands in the warm spray for a few minutes before turning the shower off completely and stepping out into the cold air. Looking around, he grabs a nearby towel and wraps it around himself. A long moment is spent shivering the chilly air of the bathroom. Poe sinks slowly to the floor bringing a second towel with him. The tiles are cold, but the towels are warm. He doesn’t move for a moment, he wants so badly to cry, but he can’t. Not here. Not now. If Poe lets his tears go now, he’ll be more vulnerable. So he holds back and pushes aside his feelings of loneliness. 

He doesn’t remember walking back to the bed or laying down, but he vaguely remembers falling asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whaaaaat? I actually posted a second chapter within a week of the previous one and /didn't/ wait a month/year to update??? I'll admit it, I've been abducted by aliens...
> 
> Anyway, I realized that this chapter is pretty short so why not just update with this chapter too? Hope you don't hate this chapter as much I did, I literally tried like ten different openings for this chapter, but in the end, I went with the thing I originally put in the beginning.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A PROMISE IS A PROMISE! IM DOING IT. YA BOI IS FINISHING THIS GOD FORSAKEN STORY!

Poe is startled awake by a group of stormtroopers entering his room. They grab by his arms and, after putting cuffs on his wrists, drag him out into the halls of the Finalizer. He doesn’t struggle, but he doesn’t just let them drag him. In all honesty he knows that there is really nothing he can do to stop them, but Poe refuses to comply with the First Order. 

Together, they twist through the winding hallways until they arrive at a transport ship while Poe does his best to fill the air with witty banter and scathing remarks. The stormtroopers waste no time in shoving Poe inside of the ship and sitting him down. 

As more stormtroopers enter the transport, Poe feels more claustrophobic. He can’t cry, not here, not now. Taking a few deep breaths, Poe pulls his legs up to his chest. He has never felt so alone in a ship filled with people. Then a painful thought comes to him, this was probably how Alise felt every day before he came for her. Imagining Alise, alone and afraid, curled in a ball with Ren looming over her makes Poe’s stomach turn. He’s not far off from that situation. 

After a few more minutes of waiting the transport finally shuts. 

The ship goes dark and Poe scoots further into the corner of the main area of the ship. Finally the ship enters the atmosphere after what feels like forever. The lights come on and Poe is dragged out into a bright town square filled with people. Most of the people in the crowd stand nearby, milling around the base of a large set of steps. The building at the top of the steps is incredibly grand and Poe would even call it beautiful if not for the First Order banners hanging from the front of it. He only has a few moments to admire the sight in front of him before he is pulled up the steps of the building. From behind, he can feel the eyes of the crowd fixed on him. 

Inside, Poe is taken through a rather busy main hall. People don’t pay any attention to him as the stormtroopers take him into a back room. He is sat down in a chair and the stormtroopers step back. Time stretches on as Poe waits for whatever is coming. After a few seconds, the door opens. Poe is genuinely surprised by Hux’s appearance. 

“What do you want,?” Poe asks in a hoarse voice. 

The general sneers at him, “Ren is giving you to me for the night. He feels that you need some... training. I have free reign over you once we return to the Finalizer. I just thought you would like to know.”

The gleam in Hux’s eyes tells Poe everything. He isn’t making it through tonight unscathed. Hux stands to leave, and Poe shifts on his chair uncomfortably. He sits in the room, waiting. With nothing to do, he thinks. It’s been awhile since he last saw Ali and he wonders if something happened to her. Then again, if Ren had hurt her in some way, it would have been rubbed in his face, not kept quiet. Poe furrows his brows. What the hell is going on? He gasps quietly. 

She must have run away. 

Just as the thought occurs to him, the pair of stormtroopers in the room with him pull him up out of his chair and into the hall. They bring him back into the entrance hall of the building. Around him are more stormtroopers, Kylo Ren, General Hux, and Snap. 

The two of them make eye contact. Only a few moments pass before Poe is taken out onto the steps. 

One of the stormtroopers shoves him down so he is kneeling in front of the gathered crowd. He hears footsteps behind him, but he doesn’t turn around even as everyone in the crowd grows quiet. He hears more shuffling behind him and his anger begins to grow. These motherfuckers think they can do whatever they can to the people of the galaxy. 

When he hears Hux speak, he doesn’t even register the words that are spoken all he can do is scream in response. He can’t tell if he says anything, but he knows that his interruption has an effect on the crowd when they all begin to speak rapidly the chatter of their voices rising into a near deafening cacophony in Poe’s ears. 

“QUIET!” Hux yells over the gathered crowd’s voices. 

When Poe realizes his friend is next to him, it is far too late. He screams out in anger and shock. This time he knows he speaks words, but he can’t comprehend them. It’s at that moment that Poe realizes that Ren is keeping him alive. If Ren ever stops being interested in him then Poe would be executed, most likely on the spot. 

His body moves on its own and at first he is hindered then he is free to scoop the headless corpse up off the steps. The growl of Ren’s voice through the mask barely registers in his mind. He only realizes that he is being dragged away when Ren speaks again. His head hurts so much and he can’t stop his need to cry.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, I'm done with the unannounced hiatus (sorry :/ ) and I'm going to just post all of the chapters one after another tonight or part tonight and the rest tomorrow morning. Then I'm taking a short break from this and posting other stories before I either post a completely different story or just update each chapter as I go along. Most likely the latter because I don't want to leave this story the way it is. I haven't finished the end to this definitively because I don't know exactly how I want to end this but it will either just be this part or a multi-part series. Whichever I do I plan to make this end satisfyingly enough to stand on its own just in case I don't ever get around to the hypothetical second part.


	14. Chapter 14

Poe doesn’t want to open his eyes. He knows Ren is waiting for him to give up. Being stubborn is pointless considering the fact that Poe doesn't have any clothes on. An ungloved hand strokes his cheek, fingers like ice. He gasps, his eyes spring open. Ren is standing over him, a triumphant smirk on his face.

He climbs onto the bed and straddles Poe’s waist. There is a moment where poe tries to shove Ren off but stops after a few moments. Ren looks down at Poe with an amused expression and leans down to plant a kiss on Poe’s lips. Upon realizing this, Poe turns his head to the side. With a quiet chuckle, Ren begins kissing his way up Poe’s throat. It only takes a moment for Poe to try and struggle from Ren’s grasp again, but Ren let out a growl. Poe shivers then gasps as he feels a set of teeth sink into his neck. 

“Stop...please,” Poe whines, “I can’t...I can’t take anymore.”

He hears no response though, but he feels Ren’s smile against his throat. Ren slowly begins to kiss across Poe’s jaw, moving towards his mouth. A knot forms in his stomach, and bile threatens to rise in his throat. Then Ren sits back up, staring down at Poe. His expression is blank, but there is a swirling pool of emotions in his eyes. Poe can’t move as he watches Ren pull off his own shirt. Ren stands, but Poe is held in place with the force. For the first time in a few weeks, Ren speaks. 

“Who do you want, Dameron?” he asks lightly. “Either me or I can call in a group of stormtroopers.”

Poe begins shaking his head quickly, he knows what the stormtroopers are like, and he also knows Ren will let them do anything to him short of death. 

“Words, Dameron,” Ren says in a slightly annoyed, but partially amused voice. “You know how to speak, don’t you? If not I can choose for you.” 

“No, wait! I...I don’t want the stormtroopers,” Poe’s voice cracks.

How has he stooped this low? He knows he won’t last forever, he’ll fall apart eventually. Ren knows it too. 

“Who do you want? Should I go get Hux?” Ren asks mockingly.

“No, not him, not again, please.” Poe can’t can’t stop himself from begging. “I...I...You.”

Ren looks at him for a long moment before hissing out, “Say it.”

“I want you,” Poe whispers. 

There is a long pause, and Poe holds his breath. It’s weird to admit that Poe does actually prefer Kylo Ren, but then again at least Ren doesn’t beat the shit out of him physically. He is able to move again, and he curls himself into a ball. A gentle hand rests on his back. He stiffens. 

Quietly Ren whispers to him. 

“Lie on your stomach, Poe.”

His breath hitches, Ren has never called him by his first name before. Poe had almost forgotten it. Not wanting to make Ren angry, Poe uncurls himself, and lies face down on the bed. The room is silent as Ren’s hand slowly creeps towards Poe’s ass. He doesn’t want this to happen again, but he knows it is inevitable, Ren will fuck him one way or another. The knowledge doesn’t stop him from whimpering. Ren’s hand rest gently on Poe’s ass, then he quickly pushes a pair of fingers up against Poe’s entrance. Poe sucks in a breath, he is ready to endure the pain. 

“I’ll let you choose how I prepare you, Poe, or I can choose for you,” Ren tells him calmly. “Lube or no lube.”

Poe doesn’t know what to say, and when he remains quiet, Ren states, “You want me to choose? Fine, no lube. Next how many fingers, none, one, two, three, four, or five?” 

This time Poe answers, “Two.”

“Two, what?” Ren stares down at him.

“I want two fingers...please.” Poe wants to gag at his own words but keeps it down. 

“Good boy, Poe,” Ren purrs softly, “Did you want lube?”

“Yes...please.” Poe wants to die but knows this is the only chance he has of making what comes next easier for himself. 

There is a moment of pause, before he hears, “I’ll use lube since you asked so nicely, but next time answer if you want something.”

Ren stands and walks away when he returns, he presses a cold slippery digit into Poe’s ass. The sensation isn’t as bad as it used to be, the first time Poe felt a lubed appendage enter him, he vomited. Now it just feels strange. Ren slowly starts to move his finger, curling and thrusting it inside. Then he pushes his second finger inside. 

Poe gasps as one of the digits rub against his prostate. Ren chuckles quietly and begins deliberately brushing against it. Ren withdraws his fingers after an excruciating minute. Poe’s ass is lifted into the air, and a hand grabs onto his member. Ren doesn’t say anything but Poe can almost feel the smug satisfaction oozing from him. Poe is hard. He wishes Ren would just get it over with, and stop going painfully slow, but he knows that will never happen. 

Ren stops pushing into Poe, and slowly spreads his fingers apart, stretching Poe out. He buries his face in the pillow, trying to kill himself, hoping to whatever force controls the universe that Ren won't notice until it is too late. But of course, Ren notices, he notices everything. His head is wrenched to the side, and he shuts his eyes in an attempt to block out what is happening to him. The digits inside him slide out, and seconds later he feels breath on his face. He cracks an eye open to see that just two inches from his face is Ren. There is the barest hint of a smirk on Ren’s lips as he stares at Poe. 

“Do you want me to be more rough with you, Dameron?” 

Ren is using his last name again. Poe quickly shakes his head.

“I don’t want this.” Poe whispers so quietly, that anyone further away wouldn’t have heard it. 

Ren doesn’t respond instead, Poe’s head is gripped by the hair, and his face is shoved into the pillow. He can barely draw breath. What little air he had is forced out of him by Ren thrusting his dick all the way into him. Poe cries out in pain. He wants to get this over with. It's hard not to focus on the way Ren’s dick is thrusting in and out him, but he makes himself concentrate on anything but the Ren’s intruding member. 

His thoughts are moved to Alise. Not once has he heard anything from or about her since seeing Snap. He still hopes that she did manage to escape. He is wrenched back into the present by Ren twisting his arm back at an unnatural angle. He gasps in pain and feels fingers wrap around his throat bruisingly tight. His head is forced back to stare at Kylo Ren. 

“Do you want to see her again?” Ren asks quietly and loosens his grip on Poe’s neck slightly.

“......Y-yes….” Poe manages to choke out.

“Yes?” Ren asks innocently.

Poe takes a long time to answer, he doesn’t know what Ren wants him to say.

“a...Pl-please….?” he begs.

Ren hums and sits back letting go of Poe’s neck. Ren stares down at him as Poe gasps and coughs. Once Poe can breathe normally again, he glares back up at Ren. It is impossible to read the expression on Ren’s face, but something about the way he looks down at him, make Poe feel slightly more relaxed. 

“Your thoughts about her are loud,” Ren says, then asks gently. “Do you love her?”

“No, she is like my sister,” Poe answers quickly.

There is a brief pause. “Do you hate me?”

Poe just stares, dumbfounded, then turns away. This man who has tortured him on multiple occasions, who has raped him more times then he has had consensual sex, who had a hand in destroying everything he has ever worked for, and who still has his dick buried deep inside him. Hate? No, not hate. He doesn’t hate Ren, he loathes him. Ren doesn’t want that answer he can tell, but he doesn’t care, Ren is also getting impatient. 

"I loathe you,” Poe grits out, tears stinging his eyes. “I would burn down the universe just to destroy you, I want nothing more than your lifeless corpse rotting away on a distant, forgotten, planet.”

Ren just hums calmly, face impassive, as he stares down at Poe. 

“What do you want from me?” Poe pleads, tears running down his face. “I just want to be free, please let me go.”

Ren continues to gaze blankly at him, head tilted slightly to the side. 

“She asks about you every day, begs to see you,” Ren states suddenly. “She begs me to let you go every time we are in the same room together. I know she regrets telling me where you were. I can see her anger, and hatred for herself every time we make eye contact,” he pauses then looks up at the wall. “Do you want to see her again?”

“Yes,” Poe whispers. 

She didn't escape then?

“I can’t hear you, was that a no?”

“Yes, I want to see her.”

Ren doesn't speak instead returns to pounding Poe into the mattress. After Poe is forced to cum, Ren finishes inside him as always. Ren moves away from him, pulling out of him. Ren stands over Poe then he gently turns him over onto his back. Then, very carefully, Ren rests a hand on his cheek. There is a long pause as Ren stares down at Poe, expression unreadable. 

“I’ll consider it,” Ren says tilting his head forward slightly. He turns, redresses, and strides out the door. 

Poe stares at the closing door and feels a bit of sadness. He wonders why he is sad about his tormentor leaving. Ren has turned an activity he would usually find enjoyable, into a painful experience that he now dreads. 

Kylo Ren has made him hate sex. 

Even the thought of it makes him feel disgusted. Some days, when Poe is too tired to fight, Ren is gentle. 

Ren doesn’t always fuck him when he is like that, but he always waits for Poe’s consent, and if he doesn’t get it, he just holds Poe, running fingers gently through Poe’s hair, or just talking about nothing. It’s a trick Poe knows, but it is so hard not to crave and it’s so fucking confusing. He needs affection after going so long without any. His mind doesn’t seem to care who the affection is coming from at this point. Poe just needs someone to hold him carefully, someone who at least pretends to care, and sometimes Ren pretends. 

After a moment of deliberation, Poe rolls out of bed and crawls into the bathroom. He turns the water on before he sits down in the shower. It doesn’t take long before the first sob wracks his body. There is no way to escape this time.

Since Snap’s execution, every time he has had to be transported somewhere, he is made unconscious, or Ren transports him. 

He prefers being unconscious. The door opens to the refresher, and Ren strides into the small room. Ren doesn’t say anything he just stands and stares at Poe. Poe feels uneasy by Ren’s sudden reappearance. What is he here for now? The room is quiet except for the shower. 

Deciding to finish washing even with the rather unnerving presence in the room. After he steps from the shower, he wraps a towel around his shoulders and turns around to stare up at Ren. There is a moment of silence before Ren ghosts the tips of fingers along Poe’s jaw. 

“You are so small,” Ren murmurs.

Poe shivers, the room is suddenly cold. Ren's voice is strange. He begins to speak but is cut off by alarms blaring. Ren seemingly disintegrates at the sound leaving Poe alone again. He returns to the bed, curling up under the sheets after closing his eyes closing his eyes.

 

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

She closes her eyes for a moment, the alarms were set off by her escape. The confusing halls of the Finalizer twist and turn around her. Now escape will be a million times harder. Ren knows she has tried to run, even if he doesn’t yet he’ll find out soon enough. At this point, there is no possibility of turning back. She has to commit to this, and get away, or face his wrath. 

Gathering her thoughts she takes the armor off of the stormtrooper she just killed. Putting the armor on is harder than she originally thought it would be, but she can’t stop. She stands, dressed as a stormtrooper, and walks down the corridor as much like a stormtrooper as she can. The hanger is filled with a sea of them all in gleaming white armor. Getting out is going to be tricky. 

Her best bet would probably be a SF TIE Fighter, they are small, maneuverable, and can make hyperspace jumps. It won’t be easy to get her hands on one but she can still try. There are other ships she can take but she'll need a plan to get any of them. 

Then like a wraith from her worst nightmares, Ren strides into the room, anger clear even with his helmet securely on his head. The other troopers move restlessly as Ren draws closer. None of them want to be near Kylo Ren when he is pissed. He begins barking orders at the group of stormtroopers. There is no time to plan. She takes the moment to inch closer to the tie fighters. 

“When you find the prisoner, take her to the interrogation room.” 

She freezes mid-step, the only times she was in that room it has ended badly for either her or Poe. He is more than pissed off at her, he wants to make her suffer. Then as suddenly as he arrived, he is gone. There isn’t much time left to get out before they shut down the main hanger. No one tries to stop her as she approaches the TIE Fighters. Somehow, she manages to get into the fighter without anyone noticing. Taking off is going to be harder, but she has to do it now. She releases the clamp on the ship and begins to take off. 

The effect is instantaneous, everyone with a weapon begins to try and shoot her down. She flies out of the hanger, like a bat out of hell. The first thing she does is set a course through hyperspace. Before she can make the jump, a voice comes through on the comm in her helmet.

“You can never truly escape me.”

She rips the helmet off, as she makes the jump.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, I know, I'm unoriginal, but I seriously have no idea what to make her escape in any other way aside from that.


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last for tonight, too tired.

The first thing Ail does when she drops out of hyperspace is plot a new course, she needs to get as far away from the First Order as she can. 

While attempting to find the fastest route out of there, a ship drops out of hyperspace just a little to the right of her. Then a second, and a third, quickly the space surrounding her is filled with other ships. She feels her panic rising with each passing moment, the Finalizer can’t be far behind them. Just seconds after the thought enters her mind, a massive ship drops out of hyperspace. 

Panic and dread well up in her, the computer isn’t finished yet. The Finalizer begins attempting to open a comm channel with her, they haven’t used a tractor beam on her ship, yet. Against her better judgment, she opens the channel. She is flooded with orders to surrender, and threats of opening fire if she doesn’t comply. Nothing in the world could prepare her for his voice. 

“Where are you going, Ali?” his voice cuts through the white noise of the other people talking. “You’re only making things worse for the both of you.”

Choking back tears, she tries to say something but is cut off by the sudden jerk of her being pulled towards the Finalizer.

“Come back and I won’t take my anger out on your friend.”

She sees that the computer has finished calculating a course out, but she can't do anything yet so she waits. For a moment the tractor beam releases her ship, she makes the jump. Her heart is pounding as she is again enveloped by hyperspace. Once she loses the First Order, She will need to find a new ship. 

They didn’t put a bounty on Poe after he escaped because Ren didn’t feel it was a necessary endeavor, but this time they will, Ren won’t stand for to her to be gone for long. At that moment the realization of what she has just done hits her. She has done the exact thing she told Poe not to do. Running will only delay the inevitable, and if she surrenders maybe he’ll go easy on her. No, she can’t think like that, that line of thinking will get her caught and back where she started. 

She could kill herself, it wouldn’t be hard. After she loses the First order ships, find a mostly barren planet, and to shoot herself. Knowing her luck though her blaster would jam, or Ren would find her too quickly, or she would land on a First Order planet. Most likely though, all three at once. 

She shakes those thoughts from her mind as she drops from hyperspace again, but this time the jump is uneventful. Just in case she makes one last jump before going to a planet to find a new ship. Preferably an unaffiliated ship. The first planet she lands on is part of a neutral system. A trader offers her a ship for her TIE Fighter and Stormtrooper armor. 

The ship is barely held together, and it is painfully obvious that the ship will probably explode if she tries to go to hyperspace with it. She declines and leaves shortly afterward. The next planet she visits is a, surprisingly, Resistance controlled planet. 

It is surprising and slightly encouraging that the Resistance still has some fight left in it. They offer a better ship in return for the TIE Fighter, and the armor. Although it isn’t the best ship she could probably get, there isn’t much room to be picky so she takes the offer. She knows staying on this planet is a bad idea, but she hasn’t got much, if any, sleep in the last day and a half. So against better judgment, she stays. 

 

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Poe awakes to a bucket of freezing water thrown in his face. Once he manages to clear the water from his eyes, he looks up at the people who awoke him. His blood turns to ice. 

The last time Hux was here, Poe couldn’t lie on his back, without screaming in pain, for three whole days. Poe swallows, and tries to think of something to say, but is too panicked to come up with a witty retort, so he shuts his mouth, and looks away. There a long silence between them, and Poe takes a moment to register the fact that two stormtroopers flank Hux. After staring Poe down for a few moments, Hux signals the stormtroopers to leave.

“Nothing to say to me?” Hux asks calmly.

“Why are you here?” Poe whispers.

“Ren is busy at the moment, and he asked me to entertain you,” Hux says as he looks down at Poe with a smirk on his face. “He told me you were scared to see me again. You didn’t enjoy the time we spent together?” 

Poe glares at the redhaired man in front of him. He doesn’t want to have to deal with Hux right now. There is so much he wants to say but knows better than to go out of his way to anger his captors. Then calmly, Hux reaches out, and grabs Poe’s face, forcing Poe to look at him.

“Are you always this quiet with Ren?” Hux stares down at Poe, and he leans in close. “Does it bother you that you can’t do anything to stop me? I can tell it does.”

Poe waits a moment before spitting right in Hux’s face. The response is instant, and Poe feels a sharp pain in his cheek before he falls to the floor. He gasps in pain as he lands heavily on his arm. With what little strength he has left, Poe scrambles back away from the person who caused him this pain. Being defiant is bad, and deserves punishment, or at least that is what they are trying to enforce on him. The problem is it is starting to work. 

Every time one these evil fuckers walks into his cell, it becomes harder to keep fighting back, but he has to hold on to the fire left in him. If not for himself, then for Alise. In the moments he was distracted, Hux had approached him. Poe comes back to his surroundings with a painful kick to the stomach. He groans in pain and curls in on himself. Then behind him, he hears some stride into the room. 

“Hux.” 

The voice, Ren’s voice, makes his heart jump in relief, and his stomach knot in fear. He is head hurts with the conflicting emotions. 

“He is being as unruly as usual. You give far too much freedom,” Hux comments. “Leave him to the stormtroopers.”

There is a long pause before, “I’ll see to it that his rations are halved, and the troopers have free reign.”

Poe whimpers softly, and they don’t notice. He looks back at them in time to see Ren turn towards the door, and start to walk away. Something in him makes him call out, “Don’t leave me!”

Ren stops dead in his tracks and looks back at him. 

“Please, don’t leave me alone,” Poe whimpers.

Now Ren turns all the way around and cocks his head to the side slightly. 

“You’re not alone, Hux is here,” Ren responds.

“I want you, don’t go, please.” Poe pleads nearly crying. 

Ren and Hux make eye contact before Hux inclines his head slightly and leaves the room. In Hux's absence, Ren slowly walks to Poe’s prone form. 

“What makes you think I won’t punish you for insubordination, Dameron?” Ren hisses, towering over Poe.

“I don’t expect to be unpunished, I just want you.”

No one talks for a long moment until Ren walks back to the door, and Poe nearly cries. He tries to stand, but he can’t, so he crawls to the monster in front of him. Ren doesn’t move until Poe is a few feet away from him. Ren moves next to Poe and crouches down. He says nothing and just stares. A shiver runs down Poe’s spine as he waits for Ren response. 

“Why should I stay if you are misbehaving? Only people who obey the rules get rewarded,” Ren murmurs.

“I’m sorry, just don’t leave,” Poe whimpers. “I need you.”

Ren stares at him a moment longer, then stands, and leaves despite Poe’s protesting. He is left alone with his thoughts. There was something about Ren’s actions that seem unusual. It isn’t often that Ren lets Hux in the same room as Poe. 

Something must have happened, and now he is extremely curious. His thoughts continue to swirl for a few more minutes, before he just lays, and waits for something. 

He must have dozed because he jerks awake to the door opening, and Ren stepping into the room. Poe looks up at him, then moves to his knees. They stare at each other for a long moment, before Ren moves aside, and an orange and white BB unit rolls into the small room. The second it notices Poe it rushes to his side and starts beeping rapidly. 

“BB-8, you’re alright!” Poe gasps then reaches out and rests a hand on BB’s body. They stare at each other for a minute. Ren is standing over them. BB quickly rolls behind Poe’s body and Poe tenses up in fear. Their fear is misplaced because Ren reaches down, and gently places a hand on Poe’s injured cheek. 

Poe stares up at his captor, trying to discover some ulterior motive, but his can’t think of any so he leans into the hand. There is a gentleness in the touch that isn’t usually there, so he ignores his gut reaction to run, and accepts the small kindness. Ren’s hand moves up Poe's face and his fingers lace with Poe’s hair. He pulls Poe up by the hair, gentler than usual, and moves him closer to the bed. The fingers in his hair release and Ren calmly sits on the edge of the bed.

“Come,” is all Ren says to him. 

Around him, Poe feels the force gently pushes down on his shoulders, and pull down on his arms. Ren wants him to crawl. Without a second thought, Poe drops down to his knees, and he crawls to Ren on his hands and knees. 

He stops just short of reaching Ren, only to be pulled in by the man’s hand. Poe is kneeling in between Ren’s legs, and with careful, but sure fingers, Ren starts to slowly stroke Poe’s hair. Poe calmly relaxes into Ren’s gentle advances, and lets his head lull to the side and rest on the inside of Ren’s thigh. Above him, Ren is quietly humming. 

A gentle wave of peacefulness envelopes him, and Poe closes his eyes. There are gentle fingers tapping on his cheek, trying to keep him awake. Ren looks down at him, mask blocking his view of Ren’s expression. He feels a pressure in his head.

'Do you want me to stay?'

Poe stares up at him pleadingly, he needs someone to stay with him. A person who pretends to care. The sound of Ren’s mask being removed draws his attention. Ren stares down at him, the ghost of a smirk playing on his lips. Poe has the sudden urge to kiss him. Poe surges forward suddenly and kiss him on the lips. Ren’s eyes open wide in shock, he didn’t expect Poe to do that. 

Feelings of worry knot Poe’s stomach, he pulls back. Time ticks by as Ren gets over his shock then places a gloved hand on Poe’s cheek, and leads Poe’s mouth back to his own. The kiss starts slow, just two sets of lips pressed against each other, then it builds to be more passionate. Poe decides to be bold again, and without breaking the kiss, lick along Ren’s lips. He feels Ren smile against his mouth, and a tongue pushes into Poe’s mouth. 

They battle for a moment before Ren inevitability gains dominance. Without warning, Poe is pushed onto his back and Ren is suspended above him. Except for the sound of breathing, silence reigns in the small space. Ren moves down Poe’s body, and as he goes, he drags Poe’s pants off his legs. Cold air hits Poe’s exposed skin. Then Ren’s face is close to his.

“Do you want this?” he whispers breathlessly to Poe.

It takes him a moment to realize what he was just asked. Ren asked for his consent. 

“Yes, I do. Do it,” Poe responds confidently. 

Ren smiles, and he leans in and gives Poe a quick, chaste kiss on the lips. He returns to his place between Poe’s legs. A second passes before Poe feels his underwear being tugged down, he lifts his hips slightly off the bed to help Ren. When Poe looks down at Ren, they make eye contact. 

Still making eye contact, Ren gently wraps his lips around Poe’s dick. The warm, wetness of Ren’s mouth makes Poe’s eyes roll back, and his head to fall back against the pillow. Poe gasps in pleasure as he feels Ren’s tongue run along his dick. 

It doesn’t take long for Poe to cum. To his surprise, Ren swallows all of his load. His pants, and underwear are pulled back into place, and two arms wrap around him, and a gentle kiss is placed on his neck. As his eyes close, he notices something slightly off about BB, but he is too tired to think right now. 

When he wakes again Ren is gone and BB-8 with him.

 

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

The cantina she arrives at is rather seedy, to say the least. It looks like this place hasn’t had a respectable patron since before it was built. Everyone in the room glances in her direction and gives her a once-over before returning to their drinks. She realizes buying a cloak would do her some good, the only problem is she has no credits. Fuck. With or without money she decides to approach the bartender. 

“I need a place to stay for the night,” she starts, “It would be preferable if you didn’t tell anyone about this transaction, Resistance or otherwise.”

He glances at her. There is a long moment where he stares at her face, then he takes a half step back from her in shock.

“Come in the back with me,” he whispers and gestures for her to follow him. 

As they step into the back of the cantina, he shuts the door behind them. A brief pause before he turns to face her. 

“How did you escape? Did you see Poe Dameron? Did they follow you here?”

The rapid barrage of questions startles her before she quickly recovers.

“How do you know who I am?” is the first logical thing that pops into her head.

“The Resistance, they had shown your picture as one of the fallen for their cause. They rectified their mistake after it was discovered you were still alive,” he explains hastily. “I thought I knew you from somewhere, then I realized I had recognized your face from the Resistance.”

Ali stood completely still as she thought for a moment. Maybe he works for the Resistance and can help her get help. But then she realizes the major players in the Resistance are still stuck in some far off system. 

“Where are the heads of the Resistance?” she asks suddenly worried. “What planet are they on currently?”

“This one, I thought that was why you had come here, to get help from the Resistance.”

Deep in her chest, she feels her heart rate increase, and breathing becomes increasingly harder. No. No, no. This can’t be true, she can’t have run from her prison just to be put into another, albeit larger one. She feels lightheaded and sits heavily on the ground. 

“Is the First Order surrounding this planet or this system?”

“Yes, they have ships here all the time, in fact, I’m surprised you didn’t see any.”

There isn’t much of a choice anymore for her, she can try to run and get caught then face horrible punishment, or she can turn herself over to the First Order. If she gets really lucky they will execute her before Ren finds out, or maybe he won’t try to beat the ever-loving shit out of her. On the off chance she does escape, where will she go? What will she do? Finally, she decides to do something, even if it is definitely a terrible idea, it is something.

“Take me to the Resistance.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The rest should be up tomorrow some time. Not sure, I don't really have any privacy because I'm at a relative's house.


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wonky PoV ahead, I apologize also longish chapter ahead

Leia stares a chart of the system that they have been stuck in for over six months. By some miracle, the Resistance has managed to survive attack after attack from the First Order, and at this point, the Order is attempting to starve out the survivors. Most of their spies are either dead, captured, or missing. The few that remain can barely get even the smallest bit of information out. The Resistance knows they have lost. Luke, her brother is gone, again, his apprentice, Rey, who has almost no formal training, is gone too, and Poe Dameron has been captured, again. This war has always looked bleak. The destruction of Starkiller was a fluke, a stroke of luck, one that will never return. She scans over the meager data that the spies have given to them. There is nothing of great importance. 

All around her alarms begin blaring, and a group of fighters moves in to protect her. Before they can escort her anywhere the alarms turn off, and someone rushes into the command room. Leia recognizes her instantly, Alise. 

“General, I’m sorry to barge in like this, but I need to speak with you,” she begins. “I know this is more than I should be asking of you. I need help getting out of the system. Somehow, Kylo Ren has pushed me here, and I am trapped here. He will come for me, and when he does, I know it will be so much worse than before. Please, Leia, you have to understand that returning to the care of the First Order is not something I want right now. Will you help me?”

Leia feels pain in her heart at the mention of her son. He is the thing this girl fears, he is a monster. 

“What of Poe?” Leia asks.

Ali looks away, and Leia nods in understanding. As far as they know Poe is dead. Hopefully, he is dead. Their conversation is abruptly by someone shouting, “We found it! We found his droid!”  
Both women look to the few remaining pilots in Poe’s squadron who are running into the control room. Behind them, BB-8 rolls into the room with them. The small group begins speaking rapidly. 

“We found something inside BB-8 that wasn’t there before he disappeared. We think it could be some kind of information.”

Leia looks down at the little droid, and asks, “What happened to you?”

BB begins beep rapidly in response.

“He says that the First Order sends a message with him.”

Every bit of excitement is sucked out of the room. A large group of people had gathered, and now everyone is silent. Finally, after a long tense silence, someone shouts, “Well, what are you waiting for.” 

Leia looks at the crowd gathered, and declares, “We will watch it.” 

Someone comes forward to hook BB-8 up to the computer. The first image that plays is that of the First Order’s new home planet. It is shot low to the ground but it is in front of the steps that lead up to the main government building. A large crowd of people have gathered in front of the steps, they are waiting for something. A man is brought out in front of the crowd. It takes a moment for everyone to recognize Poe. He is led to the edge of the steps and is shoved to his knees. After a few moments, more people come onto the platform behind Poe, one of them clearly the figure of Kylo Ren. The crowd grows quiet almost instantly. The next person to step up the top of the stairs is Hux. Some of the people gathered in the room growl once he steps into view.   
He begins speaking, “Recently a member of the Resistance has been apprehended. He has caused many problems for us in the past, but now he is being brought here to be executed.”

Up until this point in the video Poe had been quiet and mostly still, but he suddenly lashes out. He lunges at Hux. Before he can do anything to the smug ginger, he is grabbed by his stormtrooper escorts. 

“YOU FUCKING BASTARD!” Poe screams. 

The people in the crowd talk among themselves, at the same time the command room in the Resistance base begins talking rapidly. 

“BE QUIET!”

The voice from the holovid silences both crowds. Hux surveys the audience, then he looks back at someone. Four or five more stormtroopers march on stage. A man is being dragged onstage. He is clearly acting brave, but the way he digs his heels into the ground, and the way he is trying to get away from his guards says otherwise. The pilots gasp in shock at what they see before them. Snap. As he is brought closer to the edge of the stage, the barely masked fear is clear on his face. He knows what is going to happen to him. Like Poe, he is pushed to his knees, unlike Poe everyone backs away from Snap. Then behind him, Ren approaches. Everyone sucks in a collective breath. Suddenly the red glow of Ren’s lightsaber flashes across the recording, and Snap’s head is rolling down the steps. Again Poe tries to get away from his guards, but this time they are ready for it and they grab him.

Poe screams. “FUCK YOU, YOU FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT!” 

Ren turns to look at Poe. 

“Let him go,” Ren says to the stormtroopers holding Poe.

The moment they let him go, he grabs Snap’s body. Ren stalks forwards slowly until he is standing over Poe’s shaking form. 

“You cling to the dead. Your friends and your pitiful resistance.” 

Poe barely acknowledges Ren’s comment. After a few moments, Ren turns to leave and Hux addresses the stormtroopers. 

“Take the prisoner back to his holding cell, and throw away the dead one.”

The first video ends there. No one speaks. Everyone is too shocked by Snap’s sudden death. There is a quiet sobbing from a few of the present people. BB beeps out quietly.

“He says there is one more.”

The second one starts unprompted. The only thing in view is a shifting black mass. It stops momentarily then moves into a room. It pauses then moves aside. In front of the camera is Poe. He is kneeling, only wearing a thin black shirt, and long loose fitting pants. His eyes widen when he lays eyes on BB-8, the droid rolls forwards quickly to its master. 

“BB-8, you’re alright!” 

Poe is seen placing his hand on BB. Then the shadow comes and stands over them. BB moves behind Poe, and Poe’s muscles contract in fear. The people in the room realize who the shadow is, Kylo Ren. A gentle caress is placed on Poe’s face. He stares up at Ren with fear and confusion on his face. A few moments pass and he relaxes into the hand. Everyone in the room begins shouting at once, but it is the person who has been quietest up until that point, that brings everyone to order.

“Be quiet!” Ali calls over everyone. “You need to calm down.”

Once everyone settles down they start the holovid again. Ren’s hand is in Poe’s hair, and he pulls Poe up to his feet and leads him near the bed. Ren sits on the small bed. 

“Come,” he says, confident that Poe will comply.

And he does, on his hands and knees no less. There are more angry whispers throughout the room, but they quiet down with a glare. Poe is now kneeling between Ren’s thighs, face uncomfortably close to Ren’s dick. Ren is now gently petting Poe’s hair. Then unprompted Poe rests his cheek against Ren’s inner thigh. The entire room breaks out in angry yelling, cursing, and some choice words about Kylo Ren’s parentage. It takes more to settle the crowd this time. When most of the people have stopped being extremely loud, Alise speaks again.

“Does anyone judge Poe Dameron for his actions?” she asks and waits. Only a few people raise their hands. She looks at all the raised hands and speaks again. “The reason Poe is doing that is because he probably hasn’t had any sort of kindness shown to him since his re-imprisonment. He is developing an unhealthy attachment to Ren because it's his brain's way of coping. Ren is manipulating him, that is why he is acting like that,” she pauses, and thinks. “Anyone who has a weak stomach, or anyone who isn't interested in seeing Poe in a sexual situation with Ren, should leave. I can't guarantee that anything of that nature will happen, but leave, now if you don't want to risk it.”

Only a few of the gathered people leave, but most stay. Leia and Ali gaze at the people still in the room. 

“No more interruptions, anyone who gets angry, or feels sick, please leave the room.”

No one says anything as the holovid resumes. Ren continues to pet Poe's hair for a few moments more, but once Poe begins to fall asleep, he taps on Poe's cheek. Poe looks back up at Ren for a moment. Poe stares up pleadingly at his captor, then suddenly, Ren is pulling off his mask. Everyone in the command room takes a collective deep breath. Leia feels her stomach drop out because the monster wears the face of her son. That monster is her son. She always knew it, but seeing his face again solidifies it in her mind. Poe and Ben (No, not Ben. That creature is not her son, that is Kylo Ren) stare at each other for a long second, before Poe rushes forward, and locks lips with Ren. 

Stunned silence gives way to angry murmurs. After a few long seconds of Ren not moving, Poe pulls away, confused. Ren stares at the pilot, nothing happens for a while, then Ren guides Poe up to his mouth, and they kiss. At first gentle, then more passionately. Ren smirks and laughs slightly. The kiss is broken moments later by Ren, pushing Poe onto the bed, and leaning over Poe’s smaller frame. Neither move for what seems like forever, until Ren slowly makes his way down Poe’s body. Once Ren starts pulling Poe’s pants down, the command center erupts into shouting again but are swiftly silenced by a glare from Leia. 

Once Poe’s pants are around his ankles, Ren moves up to Poe’s face again, and asks Poe quietly, “Do you want this?” 

No one in the command room makes a sound until Poe replies, “Yes I do,” everyone in the room gasps in horror, and then, “do it.” 

Everyone is in shock as Ren moves down Poe’s body again, and pulls the underwear down with him. Without a moment’s hesitation, Ren swallows Poe’s dick. Poe gasps in pleasure and flops against the pillow. Some people leave the room, disgusted by what they are seeing. Jess, one of Poe’s friend’s, rushes over to a small empty bucket. She promptly fills it with the contents of her stomach. Other people hold their midsections but no one else vomits. After a few minutes, Poe finally orgasms. 

Ren redresses Poe quickly and begins spooning him. The image cuts out after a few moments. No one talks, they just stare at each other in stunned. Some of the people in the room are crying quietly. Most Resistance members know Poe, and a lot of them knew him well. For them, it must be hard to see their friend, and commander brought so low. In the corner, Jess is hugging another pilot, they are both mourning the loss of both Snap and Poe. Leia is sitting on a chair, face buried in her hands. Poe is like a son to her, and she feels as if she has lost another child to the First Order and Snoke. Alise clears her throat.

“I don’t how many of you know, but I escaped that. Poe did too, but he couldn’t return to you because of certain circumstances. Snap went to Poe to deliver news, and to keep him company. They were probably captured around the same time, but since Ren had other...uses for Poe, Poe was kept alive. I left him there. I did this to him.” Her breathing increases and she feels everyone watching her. When she meets their eyes, it isn’t anger she sees, it’s mostly pity and disgust. 

Alarms blare, and staff scrambles to their stations. People start to announce what is happening. The First Order is coming. Alise looks like a caged animal, ready to run or fight, whichever comes first.

“They are trying to contact us!” someone shouts from across the room. “What should we do, General Organa?”

Leia stands up from her seat and takes a deep breath. “Patch them through.”

A moment passes and the face of General Hux appears before the people in the room. He takes a moment to look Leia up and down. 

“Where is the girl. We know she is here.”

Alise is curled into a ball under the lip of the projection table. She can’t let Hux see her. If Ren finds out that she-

“Where is she,” Ali’s train of thought is halted by Ren’s sudden introduction. The room goes silent. Everyone in the command room stares at him with open contempt. Leia looks at the monster in front of her. The thing she thought was her son, the one she thought could be saved. Now, when she sees that mask, that face, she feels sick. 

“She is under the Resistance’s protection,” Leia spits out. “You’ll have to come here, and get her, Kylo Ren.”

His chuckle is distorted by the mask, but the intent is clear. “I see you got my message.”

“You are an abomination. I hope you die alone, afraid, and cut off from the force. You were never my son, he died with the other children you slaughtered.”  
This time Ren throws his head back and laughs openly. “I’m glad you finally realize the truth. You could never save your son, he is already dead. Now, give her to me, or we will be forced to make you comply.”

Leia stands up as straight as she can, and starts to speak. “We will not hand over one of ou-”

Abruptly, she is cut off by Alise. Ren stares directly at Ali, taking in her appearance with mild interest. 

“How long are you going to run?”

“I’m not running,” She responds quickly.

“Is that what stealing a TIE Fighter, and rapidly making jumps through hyperspace to lose us is called now? I wasn’t aware.” He replies dryly.

“I’m sorry I don’t like being tortured, and raped, I’ll just get on a ship and fly to you right now.”

He doesn’t respond immediately. An officer approaches him and tells him, “We are approaching the planet now, sir.” 

Ren dismisses the officer with the flick of his wrist and addresses Ali. “That won’t be necessary, I will deal with you and the resistance scum personally.”

Alarms continue blaring in the command center around Leia, and the transmission ends. People start to scramble about. “What should we do, General?”

Leia pauses a moment and then looks at the few remaining Resistance members. 

“All the youngest, all the best fighters, and all the best strategists need to evacuate. If any of you are willing to stay and fight, raise your hands now.”

The air is filled with raised hands. 

“I can’t ask you to stay, in fact, I plead you to leave, the galaxy needs the Resistance to survive. Without us, the galaxy will be ruled by the tyranny of the First Order. I will not think lowly of you for leaving, I will think more highly of you for it. All of you must go, now.”

“What about you, Leia?” Admiral Ackbar asks her.

“I will stay, it might give you a slight head start if they focus on me.”

People start to protest but are silenced. “We have wasted too much time as it is. Go, now!”

No one speaks as they move to the hangers, readying ships to leave. Only essential personnel and a few of the more stubborn, and courageous people are left in the room with Leia. Ali is straggling behind the others. Leia calls out to her. “I never got a chance to apologize, but now I want to tell you, I’m sorry for leaving you in the hands of that monster.”

Ali just shakes her head, and give Leia a hug. “You had more important things to do. I wasn’t that important to your mission. You made the right choice.” 

With that, Ali turns and runs. Leia watches the people quickly file out of the room, and waits. Within thirty minutes, stormtroopers rush into the room, followed shortly afterward by Ren. Leia stands tall in front of the man she once considered her own. Neither speaks for a long enough amount of time to make some of the other people in the room to shift uncomfortably. 

“The supreme leader is very keen on meeting you, General Organa. He requested that you be brought before him, alive.” Ren turns his head to the other Resistance members. “He didn’t say anything about any other prisoners. Shame I didn’t find my little pet, maybe I should replace her with someone else.”  
Leia’s head snaps up to make eye contact with Ren. 

“You already have a ‘pet’, don’t you?”

“True, but I did thoroughly enjoy having a toy that isn’t broken.”

Off to the right, a girl tries to attack Ren but is grabbed by the stormtroopers behind him. Ren moves to stand over the girl. He reaches down, grabbing her chin and tilting her head up to face him. 

“Do you want to be like Dameron, little girl?”

She looks at him wide-eyed and does her best to shake her head. 

Ren hums calmly, then announces, “I think your beloved general should have to choose, what do you think?” 

He turns back to Leia, and stalks closer to the woman, dragging the girl with him. “Your choice, she gets to stay with me, or I can send her to the spice mines.”

Leia stares at the girl. The girl’s parents had abandoned her on Q’dar, leaving her to die. The Resistance had taken her in, and Leia remembers promising to protect her. Leia thought she had left with the other Resistance members. Leia swallows thickly. Regardless of the choice she makes, she is damming the girl. A moment of deliberation and Leia comes to a decision. 

“Take her.”

Leia can almost see the malevolent smirk on Ren’s face, but Leia can’t damn her to hard labor and certain death. All she can really hope for is Ren not doing too much to her. Most likely he will kill her, but at least it will be less painful than the mines.

“You want me to keep her.” Ren’s laugh is cruel, metallic, and makes Leia’s blood run cold. “I wasn’t going to before, but if you insist, I’m sure I could find somewhere to keep her.”

Ren lets go of the girl suddenly causing her to crumple to the ground, and the stormtroopers drag the girl to her feet. 

“Look at her General,” he orders, “look her in the eyes, and tell me what you want me to do with her.”

Every fiber of Leia’s being wants to ignore Ren, but she can’t show weakness in front of him. She has to be strong. When they make eye contact, Leia sees the betrayal clear on the girl’s face. It breaks her heart to see the look in the girl’s eyes. 

“Say it.” Ren hisses.

Leia forces herself to maintain eye contact with the girl. “Take her.”

“Take her? As what, General?”

“Take her as your...as your pet.”

Leia can feel the triumphant smile on Ren’s face, even behind the mask. 

“Bring the general back to the finalizer, and take this one too.” Ren looks at the other Resistance fighters. “Kill the rest.” Leia is grabbed by the arms and is lead to a ship. When she glances back she sees Ren and a pair of stormtroopers leading the girl to the command shuttle. Then the ramp shuts in her face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so happy I'm actually getting this done at long last.


	17. Chapter 17

Poe breathes in deep. The air of the ship filling his lungs, and making him lightheaded. Maybe Ren is putting something in the air, or maybe it’s the fact that his food and water remain untouched beside him. 

There is is something off about today. He rarely is allowed to sleep this long. Last time he was allowed to sleep in, Ren had kept Poe up all night. So, naturally, he is terrified. Maybe it was just an accident, but he knows that’s bullshit. They never make mistakes. Taking another much more shaky breath, he stands. Fear still grips him as he slowly walks to the refresher. The room is almost completely silent. A gentle hum that seems to come from the walls is the only sound that pierces the heavy quiet. 

In the refresher, Poe pulls his pants down, and stands over the toilet. Without meaning to, Poe catches a glimpse of himself in the mirror. He looks like shit. His eyes are sunken, his face in becoming very pale, and his hair is longer and a dull brown. All along Poe’s neck are very clearly visible bruises and bite marks. 

A part of him hates what he has become. Another is happy. It wants to be free of cares, and worries. It needs someone to tell him what to do. Deep in the back of his mind, Poe knows he won’t last much longer unless he escapes again. That isn’t going to be happening though, the door to his room has only opened for Ren or other such authorized personnel. And since Ren’s last visit, they have a knight of Ren guarding him at all times. He feels so special. 

A part of him wants to die, wants him to kill himself. Though he doubts he’ll get very far into the attempt with his guard always watching him. Honestly, why the knight has to watch him shower is beyond Poe, but he does, and it is weird as fuck, especially when it happened the first time. His guard is standing in the far corner, watching him like a hawk. Poe is so tempted to ask why the fuck he needs to be watched constantly. If Poe is honest with himself, he doesn’t care that much. 

Another thing is, he hasn’t left these rooms since Ren has last visited. Poe glances back at his guard, and pulls his clothes off before stepping into the shower. He washes himself as fast as he can, and steps out into the cold air. As he searches for a towel, the knight in the corner stirs. Poe stiffens as the man brushes past him out of the room. That’s odd, his brows crinkle in confusion as he continues to stare at the door. 

A shiver brings him to the present, and he finally finds a towel, and begins to dry himself off, unaware that the door opened again behind him. Because of him not having heard the door open, when a gloved hand strokes his hair gently, he jumps away in surprise. It takes him a second to piece together what is happening, and he turns to face Kylo Ren. The taller man is staring down at him, head cocked slightly to the side. When Poe opens his mouth to speak, he hears in the deep distorted voice of Ren’s mask, “Don’t.”

His mouth snaps shut, and he waits. Ren does nothing for the longest time, and in that time, Poe becomes painfully aware of his nakedness. As he moves the towel to cover his most private parts, the force rips the cloth from his grip, and into Ren’s hand. Poe swallows, unsure of what to expect from Ren. Poe is dragged over to Ren and pushed to his knees. A set of fingers cruelly grip on Poe’s unruly, curly brown hair. He winces in pain as his head is pulled back by the hair. 

The silence continues to grow, and Ren is clearly not in the mood for Poe’s wisecracks right now. A feeling of sudden dread rises in Poe. Why is Ren so mad at him? A dark chuckle penetrates the air. 

“I am not angry with you, pet.” Ren starts a hint of malice lacing his words. “Your infuriating friend is the one I wish to bring harm upon, but alas, she has run from her home. From me. From you.”

Poe feels something resembling hope rises in his chest. She ran. Alise ran from her captors. If only he could find a way out of this. Ren growls in anger, and drags Poe out of the refresher, by his hair. Poe gasps in pain, he begins to struggle to get away from Ren. He manages to wiggle out of Ren’s iron grip with only a few hairs missing. Poe scrambles away, only to have Ren freeze him in place. 

“If you value keeping all five of your senses, you will crawl to me on all fours, and beg me to punish you for your mistake.”

Poe swallows thickly, he only has a few seconds to make the decision before Ren makes it for him. It really isn’t a choice. So Poe resigns himself to the floor, and he moves closer to Ren. Again Ren stops him mid-movement. The only reason Poe hasn’t fallen over is because of the force. It had always deeply bothered Poe to be unable to move, for Ren to freeze him like this. For some reason, Ren decides that leaving Poe this way is a good idea. A longing to be allowed to move takes over his thoughts. Poe looks up at Ren pleadingly. Ren barely acknowledges Poe’s silent pleas. Ren clearly wants Poe to beg for the privilege to move. 

A stone settles in his stomach, and he cautiously whispers, “Please”

Ren looks as disinterested as ever. 

“Please,” Poe asks louder.

Nothing. 

“Please, I want to be able to move.”

Ren turns his head slightly toward Poe. 

“Please,” Poe pauses for a moment wracking his brains, what does Ren want? “I’m yours.”

The words are acid on his tongue, but the response is almost instant. Ren lets him go so swiftly Poe almost falls on his face. Across the room, Ren hums approvingly. Once Poe is stable again, he continues to move towards Ren. It takes a few seconds before he is at Ren’s feet. There is an expectant air about Ren, but Poe isn’t keen on being punished. 

“Do you value your sight, Dameron?” Ren hisses out through the mask. 

Poe has trouble starting, but he manages to spit out, “Please punish me.”

Fingers run through Poe’s hair yet again. “Did you forget your manners, Pet?”

Poe hates the idea of being a pet, but something in him is excited by the thought. It was painful to say the first time, but he believes that Ren would actually be cruel enough to steal his vision. 

“Please punish your pe-pet, Sir.” 

Poe feels like a part of his resolve die every time he lowers himself to the place of an animal. A toy for the man who murdered one of his closest friends. His chest burns at the memory of Ren mocking him as he sobbed over the lifeless body of Snap. Ren’s hand cup’s Poe’s chin, as he studies Poe. Ren removes his mask, and he places on a nearby flat surface. He reaches down and holds Poe’s head in place as he grabs his lightsaber. The heat of the saber igniting so close to his face is nothing compared to the pain of the blade being pushed against the skin of his shoulder. All he can do is scream in pain as Ren continues to hold the blade to Poe, branding him. When the blade is turned off, Poe can do is sob hoarsely in pain. Ren continues to hold Poe’s face up so he can look at Poe’s face. Ren’s face had remained expressionless throughout the branding process. 

“Do you think you have been punished enough?” Ren whispers. 

Poe can’t decide if Ren will torture him more regardless of what he says but decides if he says yes, and he does get “punished” more, it will be partly his fault and could give him a sense of control. He shakes his head no. 

“No? What should do next then?”

Poe doesn’t want to piss Ren of right now, not injured as he is. 

“What you deem fitting.” Poe croaks out hoarsely. 

“I should punish you every time you forget in to address me properly,” he states, an obvious warning to Poe for him to call Ren “Sir”. 

“I think your punishment could be the removal of your tongue if you forget three times.”

Poe’s mouth drops open in disbelief. 

“You already have two offenses. You better remember, for your own sake.”

Poe feels the urge to cry or scream, or both. Ren is still staring down at him.

“Do you understand pet?”

“Yes, I do, Sir.”

“Good boy,” Ren murmurs the simple praise to Poe. “Do you regret not addressing me properly?”

“Yes, Sir.” Poe whispers gaze averted, his pride shrinks back as tears threatening to fall.

“Do you want me to forgive one of your offenses?”

Poe’s eyes shoot up to Ren’s, looking for even the hint of a deception in Ren’s face. He can’t find any though. 

“I do, please, Sir.”

“Get on the bed, pet,” Ren growls. 

Poe shivers, and crawls to the bed, and clambers onto the mattress. The room is silent as Poe waits. Ren stands over him and smiles. 

“I’m going to use the force on you, If you can hold back from cumming for three minutes, I’ll give you a reward.”

Poe nods and tries to relax as Ren practically lays on top of him. Ren leans on his forearms directly over him. As the two of them stare into each other’s eyes, Poe feels Ren reach inside his mind. It isn’t painful anymore. After a feel moments, something in him flips. Gasping as arousal pools inside him, Poe can’t continue to look into Ren’s eyes. The hungriness he sees staring back at him is terrifying. As he looks away Ren kicks up his force probing. He arches his back and lets out a loud keening sound. His body is pressed up against Ren’s with his shamefully hard dick pressed into his captor's stomach. A few moments of intense mind-bending pleasure, Ren speaks softly into his ear.

“Look at me, Poe.”

The gentleness in Ren’s voice is what draws him back in. As the two of them make eye contact again, the intensity of the pleasure drops to a manageable level. 

“Two more minutes.”

Clearly, if Poe breaks eye contact, Ren will force more pleasure onto him. Even now, Poe can tell that he will have immense trouble with lasting two more minutes. Ren’s breath fans out across his face. One of Ren’s hands cups the back of his head. Ren presses his shockingly soft lips against Poe’s chapped ones. Ren pulls out of his head entirely leaving Poe high and dry.

“One minute left.”

Ren slams back into Poe’s head smashing into his pleasure center and pushing him right to the edge. The feeling that encompasses him isn’t even pleasure anymore it painful in a way. Great fat tears cling to Poe’s lashes as he tries desperately to stop himself from cumming. It takes all of his concentration not to let go right then. The fingers in Poe’s hair gently tangle in his curls. Just when he thinks he can’t hold back anymore, Ren speaks. 

“Cum.”

The next moment Ren has his hand wrapped around Poe’s dick. Poe screams as his eyes roll back into his head. Everything stops for a moment as he sees stars. He floats for a few minutes before coming back down. Ren stares at him in awe before pulling Poe into a rough kiss. Without thinking Poe wraps his arms around Ren’s shoulders wincing in pain as the burn on his shoulder is jostled. Ren breaks the kiss to stare at the wound as if it personally offended him. 

With shocking care, Ren places his hand over the wound and closes his eyes. An intense feel radiates into Poe from his wound. A few moments pass and Ren removes his hand. The wound doesn’t hurt anymore and is just a small scar at this point. Poe stares up at Ren in shock. Neither of them speaks as Ren returns to Poe’s mouth. Something nags at Poe about the moment. He is temporarily distracted from his thoughts as Ren fucks him. He can’t shake the thought though. It gnaws away at him as he lays in bed next to Ren. 

“I’m not in touch with the light side.”

It sounds like he isn't sure.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I over-estimated my abilities! I won't be able to finish all of them tonight mostly because I rewrote half of this chapter. I will keep posting until I finish. expect maybe one or two a day. if I can do that, I'll be finished by the end of the week. Then again, I don't have much time tomorrow because of thanksgiving.


	18. Chapter 18

Empty space stretches out in front of her. The few Resistance members that she took with her on her ship are silent. They have nothing to say. Somehow, Alise knows they aren’t going to be returning to the other Resistance members, these ones are going to hide. Some will be caught, but some will disappear, they’ll find work, build families, and be forgotten. 

She envies them. Unlike her, Kylo Ren doesn’t want them. He is on the hunt for her, not them. At least not in the same way. It makes her want to find a completely uninhabited corner of the galaxy and to just disappear. A small part of her says that running will only make Ren angrier, that running is pointless, that if she goes back now, and begs for Ren to forgive her, he might be kinder to her. No, she can’t, she has to run. Maybe Poe will try to escape too, because of her. That thought gets smashed to pieces when she remembers the holo of Poe. He probably has better security than she did. Ren isn’t going to be taking any chances of Poe getting away again too. 

She feels her throat constrict, and tears beginning to form. Before now she hadn’t let herself really grasp what has been happening to her this past year, but now that she has a break from it, a perhaps brief reprieve, she can’t hold it back anymore. A sob rocks her frame. Someone lays a hand on her shoulder and telling her to get some sleep. They’ll take over from here. It takes them pulling her to her feet for her to realize what they said. The moment she lies down, tiredness crashes over her. The last thing she remembers before falling asleep is them jumping to hyperspace.

 

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ren stands in front of the large doors that lead to the holoroom where General Hux, Leia Organa, and he will speak with the Supreme Leader. He feels the excitement inside him grow. Ever since he killed his father, despite what Dameron thinks, he hasn’t felt the light side call to him, and now he feels the darkness rise within him. When he delivers Leia to Snoke, he knows any remaining light in him will be extinguished. 

The doors open, and the three of them enter the room in silence. They stride towards a slightly raised platform. Right before they step onto the small platform, the holo-projection turns on, revealing Snoke. Leia’s steps falter only for a second, but enough for the men around her to notice. Once they are standing in front of the Supreme Leader, Snoke begins to speak. 

“You finally see the truth, you now see that your son is dead.” Snoke begins.

“I see that you have corrupted him,” Leia interrupts. “It was you that told him told him to torture Poe, I’m sure.”

“Far from it, general, he made that decision himself,” Snoke says, obviously amused. Then in a more serious tone, “You think I’m lying. Kylo Ren, show her the truth.”

Ren moves to stand in front of Organa, he feels an icy joy at the thought of breaking her more. He raises a hand and pushes his memories to her. The first time he took Poe, capturing Poe again, every touch, and every moment he was with Poe. He doesn’t stop when Leia falls to her knees and throws up, he only stops when Snoke orders him to stop. Leia is on the ground trembling, but Ren barely acknowledges her except to avoid the puddle of vomit on the floor. 

Snoke turns to Hux, “What of the remaining Resistance member, general?”

“Most of them escaped before we could apprehend them, but we did shoot down several of their fleeing ships.” 

Ren idly wonders if any of those ships contained Alise. 

“We have tracked down a few of the ships that fled, and we are ready to attack once given the order.”

“Go, destroy the last of the Resistance.”

Hux turns and strides out of the room, leaving Ren, and Leia alone with Snoke. 

Snoke turns to study Ren. He feels calm, unlike before. When he was younger and more foolish, he didn’t trust his master. Ren had thought Snoke was using him, but now he can see that the Supreme Leader cares for him. Now Ren understands. 

“How long did you plan on keeping them a secret from me, Kylo Ren?” 

“Forgive me Supreme Leader, I was foolish for lying to you.”

“Do you want to keep them?” Snoke asks, tone abnormally light.

“Yes, master, only if you allow me to.”

Snoke stares down at Ren. A familiar pressure builds in Ren’s head, as Snoke searches through his thoughts. When Ren was younger, he had fought back against the Supreme Leader. He knows now that his master is doing this for Ren’s good. If Ren keeps secrets from his master, then Ren can’t be trusted. Snoke is doing this so he can trust his apprentice, not hurt him. After a long pause, Snoke sits back.

“You may keep the pilot, and the Resistance girl, but you must kill the girl once you find your spy.”

Ren bows his head, “Thank you, Supreme Leader.”

“Take General Organa, and prepare her for execution.”

“Yes, Supreme Leader.”

With that, the holo-projection of Snoke disappears. Ren stands up straight and looks to Leia. 

“Get up.” He commands.

“Are you too afraid to touch me, Kylo Ren?”

Ren feels his anger bubble up at the woman on the ground in front of him, and without thinking, he backhands her across the face. It takes him a moment to reel in his anger. A familiar yet confusing feeling slams into him. Brushing it aside, he focuses on calming himself. Once he has relaxed, a thought pops into his head. 

“I’ll allow you to see your beloved pilot before you die...”

She looks at him skeptically, “If?”

“If you tell him about the girl.” 

Ren watches her face as she battles internally. 

“Let me see your face.”

Ren smoothes his expression under his mask, then reaches up, and pulls it off his head. The look of sadness in her eyes makes him feel the same cold joy from earlier. That other feeling touches his mind again, but he pushes it away again. It is the light side trying to tempt him he decides.

“What is your decision, General?”

The look in her eyes is broken.

“Don’t make me tell him that, Please. I can’t break him like that.”

She doesn’t make eye contact with him as she waits for his response. He prefers her subordinate to him he decides as he considers her request. Honestly, he has already made up his mind, but he wants to make her squirm. 

“I won’t make you tell him that,” Ren tells her, voice even.

She looks up, surprised. He studies her. 

“Order your precious little pilot to do everything I tell him to and watch.”

The look of disgust that crosses her face makes him feel the touch of the light side. 

“Do you accept?”

“Let me talk to him first.”

“I’ll let you talk to him afterward, for an hour.”

Leia thinks about it, then turns away, pain apparent in her eyes. 

“What will you make him do?”

“Whatever I’m in the mood for at the moment,” Ren says casually.

Leia looks down, “Are you going to rape him?”

He pretends to ponder a moment. “I will fuck him, yes, but he will consent to it. He will consent because you will tell him to. I wonder how betrayed he will feel when you force him to say yes to me.”

The anger in Leia’s eyes makes him laugh and the cold feeling of the light side pools in his stomach. She always told him anger leads to the dark side, and now here she is, anger burning in her eyes, wish to kill in her heart. 

“Do you accept?” He asks again.

Leia closes her eyes “I get to speak with him after?”

Ren inclines his head.

“I… refuse your offer.”

That answer gives him pause. She looks set on not being able to speak with Dameron and on her dying. Everyone else has accepted his offers up to this point. He replies after a moment too long. 

“He will be attending your execution.”

“Why? So he can despise you more? Good, shoot yourself in the foot.”

He does his best not to react openly. 

Leia continues. “You just want to trick me into doing something horrible to Poe which would, in turn, force him closer to you. I know how you work, you may be a monster but you are still my son.”

She has a point, he thinks. Ren brushes the thought aside. If she doesn’t agree to this she will be a sore spot for Poe. It doesn’t take him long to think of something.

“If you won’t agree to this I will have him tortured in your name.”

They stare at each other for a few moments before Leia breaks eye contact. They both know that either way, Poe will be hurt because of her, but at least with the deal, Ren offers she will have some semblance of control.

“Fine. I...I’ll do it.”


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As pointed out to me by Zoe_Dameron I posted chapter eighteen twice I didn't realize it at the time because I'm dense. I have rectified the issue and will now be posting the actual chapter nineteen

Poe rolls over onto his side still tired. He wants to go back to sleep, but he has to use the refresher. It takes much more effort than usual to get out of bed. When moves, he feel the sheets stick him, as he glances down, last night’s events come rushing back. He retches and stumbles into the refresher. 

A small part of his mind acknowledges that the Knight currently guarding him follows him into the room. Thinking back to the previous night, he decides that is why he is so tired right now. Poe turns the shower on and sits on the toilet. 

He lets his mind wander for a few minutes and he finds himself wondering if his guard ever eats, or sleeps. No matter when he wakes up, there is always a guard standing still as a statue in the corner. It bugs him that he has a person watching him all the time. He remembers one morning waking up with a hard-on, and having to deal with it while the faceless knight watched his every move. The guard makes him a little uncomfortable, to say the least. 

Then again, as long the knight is here, Poe knows Ren isn’t coming yet. It’s not that Poe hates Ren, but...wait did he just claim that he doesn’t hate Ren? The man who forces Poe to have sex with him whenever it suits him. The man who killed Snap. He hates, him...right? No, of course, he does. Poe feels his head spin, and bile rises in his throat. Before he can do anything to stop himself, he is on his knees, vomiting. Most of it is bile, but some of it is his meal from last night. 

Once he finishes, he feels the water turn off, and someone pulls him out of the shower. They plop him on the ground, and he glances up at the person. It’s his guard. When Poe tries to stand they push him down, and roll him onto his side. He closes his eyes, lying on the cold floor. For some reason, he isn’t left there long. A towel has just been wrapped around him, then he feels a toothbrush scrubbing his teeth. Once the brush is out of his mouth, he asks, “Why are you helping me.”

There is a pause, then, “Ren doesn’t want you to be damaged while he is away.”

The voice surprises him a little, there is a slight feminine edge and a part of him feels safe when he hears that voice. Clearly, the knight isn’t to keen on any more questions, because the water turns on, and they direct his head toward the flow of water. After that, Poe is half dragged, half carried to the bed, and is deposited with surprising care under the sheets. Without prompting, Poe falls asleep. He is awoken a few hours later by a gloved hand stroking his cheek. Instead of opening his eyes, Poe opts to groan and pull away a bit. 

“He’s awake.” Ren says aloud.

And before Poe can respond in any capacity, “You should have let him sleep.” 

Poe’s throat constricts a little, and he can’t help the feeling of hope that rises in him.

“Leia?” Poe tries to say, but it comes out in a broken little croak. Across the room, Leia feels her heartbreak. Poe is hoping she will save him, but she has made a deal with the devil, and she is only here to make him suffer. Poe doesn’t understand why she is here, with Ren. 

“Leia?” Poe calls again, more desperate. Is Ren playing tricks on him? Poe opens his eyes, but Ren puts his hand over them. 

“Leia!” Poe cries out, “Please!”

Then, from the dark of the room, Poe hears, “Poe, I’m here.”

The hand is replaced with a piece of cloth. Suppressing the urge to remove the blindfold, Poe sits up on the bed. A hand suddenly rests on his inner thigh, and Poe tries to kick Ren away from him. No, no, no. Not now, not in front of Leia. He can’t let Ren do this to him anymore. Poe wants to be free. 

“Poe… don’t…" there is a long pause. "Stop fighting.”

It feels like someone just punched him in the gut. He stops moving just from the shock of Leia’s words. 

“Why?” Poe asks quietly. 

“Because I’m ordering you to stop.” She replies blandly. 

Is Leia telling Poe to let Ren touch him? Why would she? It has to be Ren, he is making her do this. In the back of his mind a quiet voice whispers, What if she doesn’t care about you? No! Leia cares about him! She would never do this willingly. Right? The blindfold is removed from his eyes without warning, and he looks around the room quickly. Leia is standing back away from him and Ren, she is staring at the floor. Poe wants nothing more than to reach out, and for Leia to protect him. 

Her head tilts up, and for a moment she makes eye contact with him. A hard, blank stare greets him. Why is she looking at him like that? Without a second thought, Poe looks away from her to Ren. Despite everything Ren has done, at least Poe knows what to expect from him, consistent cruelty, pain, deception. When Ren pushes him back on the bed Poe tries to push him away, but he hears Leia tell, no order him, “Don’t fight him, Poe.”

Poe stops and allows Ren to slowly kiss up his neck. Then, Ren gently begins kissing Poe’s lips, he then pushes his tongue into Poe’s mouth. Even though Leia told him not to, Poe tries to dislodge Ren’s tongue from his mouth, and again, “Poe, don’t fight.”

Poe is too confused to notice that Leia’s words are tinged with bitterness. All he can do is follow orders. Maybe Leia has a plan to help them escape and is just waiting for Ren to be distracted enough to start it. Or maybe she is testing him, seeing how far he is willing to follow her orders. She knows what she is doing, clearly, he just needs to trust her. That thought goes out the window when Leia orders Poes to remove Ren’s clothing. She doesn’t look at him. He feels confused, and whimpers, “Leia?”

“Just let him… let… allow him to have… intercourse with you.” Leia replies. She feels like someone has just poured acid down her throat. 

Poe stares at her, confused, and scared. He looks at Ren who has a neutral expression on his face. Something is wrong. Deep inside him a voice whispers, Ren doesn’t pretend to care about you, but Leia did. She doesn’t care about you. Ren does care. He allowed you to heal, and he gave you a bed, and a refresher to clean yourself. Leia wouldn’t give you any of those. She doesn’t, and will never care about you, not like Ren does. 

Ren doesn’t care about Poe, Leia does care. Doesn’t she care? Sure she might have had him do missions while he had a little bit sick or very minorly injured, but that was only when it was a necessity, Leia needed him because he is the best pilot in the Resistance, no one else was able to do those jobs. 

Ren didn’t make you do anything until you were healed. Poe looks between the two of them, then whispers, “No.”

“What?” ask both of them staring at him in shock. 

“I’m not taking orders from you anymore,” Poe says looking straight at Leia tears gathering in his eyes. “You don’t care about me, if you did, you wouldn’t allow anyone to take advantage of me.” 

The expression of hurt on Leia’s face still affects him, but he does his best to brush it off as he turns away from her. Ren pulls his clothes on and turns to Leia, and whispers something in her ear. She goes pale and covers her mouth with her hands. 

“I’ll leave you two alone,” Ren says and opens the door.

“Stop, please! Don’t leave me alone with her! Please, sir!” Poe cries out to Ren’s retreating back. He stops and looks at Poe with something close to smug satisfaction. 

Ren turns to Leia, and says calmly, “You heard him, he doesn’t want to be alone with you.”

“You’re a monster, Kylo Ren. I can’t believe I thought you could be saved.”

Ren laughs openly at her statement. “I’m not the one who went beyond our deal. You are the one who did that, mother.”

Leia looks sick, but Poe doesn’t care. When she tries to get close to him, he scrambles away, and cries out, “Please!”

Which in turn causes Ren to move between Poe and Leia. Ren then calls the guards into the room. 

“Do you want her to go, Poe?” Ren asks him sweetly. 

Without hesitation, Poe nods and stares at Leia in fear. He hates the look on Leia's face as the troopers gather around her. She looks...empty. Ren tells the stormtroopers to take Leia to a cell and to put at least six guards outside the room. Once Leia is dragged out Ren turns to face Poe. 

“Do you want to be at her execution?”

“No.”

“Do you want to see her execution?”

“No,” Poe says after a short pause. 

Ren turns to leave again, but Poe calls out to him, “Can you stay with me tonight, sir? I need someone near me while I sleep.”

Ren looks back at Poe, slightest smirk on his lips. “Of course, Pet. I have things to tend to at the moment, but I will stay with you tonight.”

With that, he is gone. Poe wants to wait for Ren to return, but he is getting sleepy. A little while later, Poe is roused by Ren climbing under the sheets, and by Ren pulling Poe in close to his body. A few moments later a kiss is planted on Poe’s head, and he feels sleep begin to wash over him again. Right before Poe goes to sleep, he whispers, “Thank you.”

“For what, Pet?”

“For showing me that the only person I can trust is you.” 

Ren says something in return, but Poe’s sleep-addled brain can’t process it.

“Thank you, Poe, for breaking Organa. I couldn’t have done it without you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whelp finally got this one finished. Took me forever to update this for some reason


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heyo I feel like shit because I (accidentally) took four allergy medicine yesterday. Don't worry I'm mostly fine just really tired and sick. Realized this should get updated because I'm practically done with this story.

Poe awakens to Ren asleep behind him. Everything is quiet and still. All he can hear is the gentle hum of the ship and Ren’s soft breathing. It’s peaceful, he realizes. He doesn’t want to break the silent stillness, but he also doesn’t want to go without a shower. After a short argument with himself, Poe stands. He hears Ren shift but nothing else. The refresher is cold and dark even with the lights on and he gets goosebumps. 

It doesn’t take Poe very long to get the shower running. He steps inside and stands there for a moment. He feels strange but he doesn’t know why. His thoughts are disjointed and when Poe feels Ren’s arms wrap around him it’s even worse. Feelings of loneliness and hurt envelop him as the two of them stand under the water. He should be running away from Ren not letting them man hug him. Even after all that Ren has done Poe can’t stop himself. A good person doesn’t fall in love with a rapist. A good person doesn’t spread his legs for the man that killed his friend. A good person wouldn’t let the man that is hellbent on destroying everything the Resistance stands for embrace him tenderly like a lover. Poe Dameron isn’t a good person. 

The thought is a punch to the gut, but almost unsurprising like he's known the whole time. Yet it causes his stomach to curl and his eyes to water. 

Poe grabs ahold of Ren’s arms unsure of if he wants to rip them away from his body and scrub away his skin where they touched, or if he wants to pull them closer until he is absorbed into Ren’s flesh and bone until he doesn’t have to think anymore. Both thoughts terrify him and in the end, he just clings to them. Tears gather in his eyes and for the first time, he doesn’t try to stop them. He curls in on himself under the weight of everything. Ren turns Poe around and holds him to his chest. The embrace is warm and strong. It makes him feel safe. It makes him feel sick. He screams at himself to beat Ren’s face into the shower wall until there’s nothing left to hold onto. The other part of him begs him to wrap himself around Ren never let go. He balls his hands into fists and tries to make himself attack but he can’t and his fists end up resting on Ren’s chest. Poe lays his forehead against Ren’s chest.

“Why can't I hate you?”

He meant to scream it at the man, but it came out as a soft question. A plea for an answer he feels there is no answer to. It breaks him. He crumples in Ren’s grip unable to do anything anymore. He’s useless, pathetic, and weak. He can’t even stop himself from letting Ren rape him. It’s no wonder why the Resistance never tried to rescue him and why Leia told him to let Ren do what he wants. Everyone knew that Poe wanted it. Ren strokes his hair as Poe bawls his eyes out into Ren’s chest. Once Poe has stopped crying Ren speaks.

“You aren’t useless to me, Dameron. I want you.”

It shouldn’t make him feel butterflies in his stomach or make his heart pound, but it does and that makes him feel disgusted. 

 

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Honestly, he hadn’t expected Poe to crumble so quickly. Clearly, Ren had underestimated how broken Poe really is. It makes him smile, maybe training Poe to be of use to him won’t be hard. He puts those thoughts away, and he proceeds to the hanger of the Finalizer. 

Soon he will be on a ship that will bring him to the surface of the planet, and to his treacherous mother. In a few short hours, her head will be rolling down the steps of the capitol building. The command shuttle is waiting in the hanger along with General Hux, and Captain Phasma. He doesn’t say a word to either of them, instead, he continues to stare at the shuttle. The crew is taking a rather long time showing up to work. 

Hux then turns to Ren and asks calmly, “Where is your weapon?”

Dammit, he forgot it in Poe’s room. Ren quickly turns and leaves to retrieve it. Behind him, he can hear Hux snickering, but he ignores it and continues on to his destination. This is definitely not a good situation. If Poe still feels like resisting Ren, Poe could try to attack him when he returns. Or Poe could try to kill himself. Breathing in sharply through his nose, he walks faster. The walk is short, and Ren only hesitates a moment before opening the door. 

The knight he assigned to watch the girl has arrived, and his ward looks mildly uncomfortable. The knight in question is holding his lightsaber, which makes him breathe a sigh of relief. Poe and the girl are sitting on the floor talking. When Poe notices him, Poe smiles weakly. He approaches Poe walking up behind the girl. She is tense. Using the force, Ren probes their minds. The girl’s thoughts are scattered and unsettled. Poe’s thoughts are still just as split as they were this morning. 

Ren approaches Poe. The vaguely happy-sad expression doesn’t leave Poe’s face as Ren draws but Poe looks more relaxed, his thoughts quieter. Ren stops in front of Poe and reaches down to caress his cheek. Poe leans in a little to the hand and closes his eyes. He looks a little disappointed when Ren turns to the girl. Ren places a gentle hand on her cheek, she flinches away, hard. He clicks his tongue, but leaves her alone and goes to retrieve his lightsaber from the knight. 

As he approaches them, he feels the slightest quiver in the force, and he could have sworn that he felt the force swirl around the person. Ren stops in his tracks and stares at the knight. He feels nothing. Brushing it off as his imagination Ren takes the saber from their outstretched hand and begins to leave. Gentle tugs on his robes stop him. Poe is standing behind him, looking a little nervous.

“Can I ask you a question, Sir?” Poe whispers. 

Ren feels the slight disturbance from the person dressed as a knight again. He pretends not to notice and gives Poe an affirmative nod.

“When will you return, I miss you,” Poe says quietly. “I don’t like being alone.”

Ren looks down at Poe, and replies, “I will be gone for a few hours, and if you want, she can stay until I return.”

Poe nods and relaxes visibly. An idea pops into Ren’s head and decides to test a theory out with Poe. Without a second thought, he pulls the mask off, and cups Poe’s chin, leaning in to kiss the man. There is a very distinct ripple in the force from the knight. Ren is positive he didn’t assign a force sensitive to guard Poe or the girl, but he will have to deal with the situation later. He is already late. Replacing his mask after he kisses Poe, Ren strides out of the room. 

By the time He makes it back to the command shuttle Hux, phasma, and a few other high ranking First Order officers are on board. 

“Glad to see you’re still alive Ren. It would have been such a shame if your little pet eviscerated you with your own saber.” Hux says with a smirk on his face. 

“I glad to know you care,” Ren says coolly.

Hux looks annoyed but says nothing in response. Even though there are still plenty of empty seats, Ren chooses to stand. No one looks at him, and everyone sits a little straighter. 

Since his training with the Supreme Leader, Ren has had a better handle on his mood swings. Instead of destroying his surroundings when he is angry, he simply uses the force to make the offending person suffer. 

One of the officers in the Command Shuttle at the moment has experienced Ren’s wrath personally. He’s a lieutenant if Ren recalls correctly. The man is staring at his shoes and has been since Ren stepped on board the shuttle. Ren is vaguely aware of them taking off out of the hanger. As Ren continues to stare the lieutenant down, the man glances up, and freezes. Clearly, he is aware that Ren is staring at him. In the back of his mind, Ren remembers what he did to the man; He had torn through the man’s entire life. Everything from his early childhood memories, to his sometimes boring, and tedious work, to his darkest secret, and every single hidden thought. Ren knows everything about the man, except for his name. He forgot that. 

Regardless, he knows the man has a thing for redheads, especially for Hux. He recalls a memory of the man masturbating to his memories of the General ordering him around. Why did Ren have to choose to read this man’s thoughts of all people? Deciding to mess with the lieutenant a bit before Hux notices, Ren pushes the man an especially… interesting memory. It of the man choking himself, with a dildo shoved up his ass. The lieutenant at the time was imagining Hux fucking him while choking him. 

With the memory, Ren sends a little message, ‘Should I let your beloved general see?’ The man pales, and shakes his head rapidly, drawing the attention of Hux. If Hux were actually able to do anything to him, the glare he receives might make him worried. It doesn't though. Ren looks away from the shaking lieutenant anyway. A part of him thinks quietly, ‘At least the lieutenant doesn’t have a thing for me.’ With that thought, Ren ignores him for the remainder of the trip. 

The planet they land on is warm, and swarming with people. Ren strides out of the shuttle first, followed by Hux, Phasma, and the group of officers. The government building is large and imposing. The last time they were here, Ren was cutting the head off of Resistance scum. What did his pet call the man? Snap? It doesn’t even matter now, the body of the headless Resistance pilot is floating out in space somewhere, or in a trash heap. His pet had been rather fond of the man. 

He feels a flicker of something but shoves it away. He is here for more pressing matters. 

There is already a large crowd gathering at the base of the steps into the building. Deep inside is the woman who took part in creating him. The woman he has been sent here to execute, by order of the Supreme Leader. Ren and everyone else who came here aboard the Command Shuttle make their way to the building. As they approach, the people who are gathered near the front steps move aside. Most of the people gathered are adults, and a smattering of teenagers, and elders. But every once in awhile, Ren sees a child’s face peeking out of the crowd from behind their parent’s legs. Some of the children point at him and whisper, but most of them either look at him with fear or hide behind their other people around them. 

As they pass through the crowd, a baby cries. The sound is highly irritating to him. He stops and turns to the woman holding the screaming infant. After a moment, the woman notices him staring her down openly. She pales, and almost drops the child in her panic. Ren reaches out a hand he touches the child’s thoughts. He passes the happiest memory he has to the child. Him and chewie playing dejarik. It was only later that he realizes Chewbacca let him win. The child stops crying after a few moments. He turns and walks up the stairs. 

Inside the building, Ren meets with the other people who are preparing everything for Leia’s execution. All of the tedious prep is leading to, in essence, the end of the Resistance. Something in Ren says he should not be willing to be committing matricide, and when he searches in himself, he finds a seed of doubt. It frustrates him. Perhaps it is some residual light trying desperately to cling to him? If he begins thinking that way, he will have to speak to the Supreme Leader about it again...

The other people who came to the planet’s surface with Ren, are discussing the impending execution of the Resistance general. Whatever they are talking about doesn’t interest him in the least. After a long talk, the officers quiet down and wait. Across the large room, Leia is dragged in, hands cuffed in front of her, and head down. If Ren didn’t know better, he would think the fire in her is dead, but when she looks up at them proudly, her eyes are bright, and her jaw clenched, his suspicions are confirmed. She clings to hope. No one says anything as they walk out onto the platform. Hux says something, and Leia is pushed to the ground on her knees. Then everything goes quiet.

“Do you have anything to say, Resistance scum?” Hux spits at her. 

Before she can say anything, blaster bolts are shot from the crowd, and one of them almost hits Ren. Anger floods through his body, as Resistance supporters attempt to rescue Leia. A few of them run up the steps, and more try to shoot at the First Order officers. Somehow, one of the Resistance shooters almost hits Ren square in the chest, but he stops it before it can strike him. Without thinking, he drags one of the people storming the stage to him and holds them in front of the bolt. Allowing the quivering bolt of plasma to continue on its path, the resistance fighter is severely injured, but not dead. Taking the opportunity to activate his lightsaber through the woman’s chest. She falls to the side, and Ren steps over her corpse, as he continues to progress down the steps, beheading Resistance fighters as he goes. 

Once he reaches the crowd, the people part, and some even push the shooters to him. It is not long before all of the fighters are dead or in binders kneeling next to their general. Ren is already back on the platform, ready to do his duty. Hux straightens up and holsters his blaster. Skimming Hux’s thoughts, Ren can see that he killed a few of the scum as well. Hux’s hair is slightly out of place. 

Off to the side, the same lieutenant from the shuttle is staring at Hux. No one else notices. 

Regaining his composure, Hux address the crowd, “The Resistance dies today. Their general is about to be executed, and they still fight the inevitable. History will forget them, and when their names are whispered in dark corners, and back alleys, they will be spoken of with hate, with insults, and with laughter. The galaxy they claim to defend has turned away from them because it doesn’t need the corruption, or lies, of terrorists. The Resistance is nothing and has always been nothing. The Resistance is dead.”

Ren takes that as his cue. He approaches the line of Resistance supporters and cuts the head of the first fighter. 

“The numbers of the Resistance dwindle each death.”

Ren cuts another head off, and it rolls down the steps. 

“They are insolent children who claim to fight for freedom!”

Another death. 

Hux calms slightly, “But, not all that fight for the resistance are there by choice. Some are forced into service by supposed friends, family, and lovers.”

Ren has skimmed the minds of the prisoners as Hux spoke. The next person in line to have their head cut off, she is thinking about defecting. A part of her is bitter that the First Order would taunt them, her and the other prisoners, like this. She wants to leave the Resistance behind. Ren grabs her and drags her to her feet, and he pulls her over to Hux. There is a moment where Hux just stares at the girl. 

“Do you renounce the Resistance?”

“Yes.” She says quietly.

“Do you swear loyalty to the First Order, and to bringing the chaos in the galaxy to an end?”

“Yes.” She says with more confidence.

“Do you severe hereby all ties with anyone who does not renounce the Resistance, and do you swear to hunt them down throughout the galaxy?” 

“I do.” She responds without pausing. 

Ren releases her and turns back to the lined up prisoners. Three of them are considering defecting, and two are certain they want to join the order. Ren asks Hux silently, do you actually want the defectors? In response, Hux simply thinks Yes. 

Without any further prompting, Ren directs the stormtroopers to the five possible converts. Some of the Resistance scum still kneeling in the line, grow restless as the five are dragged to their feet, and are taken before Hux. Only one of the Resistance supporters refuses to convert. They didn’t need their head, it’s not like they were using it anyway. The others, the ones that submitted, stand behind the officers. None of them talk. 

“No one else?” Hux asks the row of people.

“Fuck you! We don’t want to be a part of your tyrannical organization! You pricks destroyed an entire system! You brainwash your soldiers, and you brainwashed a good man into being a sex slav-” Ren cuts the man off by strangling him. The terrorist struggles for air as his windpipe is crushed. 

“Let him go, Ren. He clearly has volunteered himself to be interrogated.”

Toying with the idea of disregarding Hux, Ren holds the man in the air a little longer, before ultimately dropping him. Even before the man can hit the ground, a small group of stormtroopers rush forwards, and begin to drag him away. There is a long pause, then, 

“You can proceed, Lord Ren. The rest of them are traitors.”

Somewhere during the events that transpired, Ren had turned off his lightsaber. Quickly he reignites his saber and beheads two terrorists in one fluid motion. Somewhere in the crowd of people, a baby begins screaming. In the back of his mind, Ren knows it is the same baby from before. With deadly grace and precision, Ren kills all of the remaining terrorists, except one. 

“General Leia Organa, Last Princess of Alderaan, and destroyer of the Empire, You have been brought here for crimes against the galaxy. Plotting terrorist attacks, attempting to assassinate Supreme Leader Snoke, and killing thousands in your quest for bloodshed. What do you have to say for yourself?”

Leia turns and looks back at Ren. Her eyes saddened, lips parted slightly, and shoulders slumped. “I will never regret having you, Ben.”

Ren promptly cuts her head from her body.

“I will never regret killing you, mother.”

There were rumors spread around that Kylo Ren, Commander of the First Order, was Leia’s child, and now he confirmed it to the entire galaxy. It doesn’t matter if people know who his parents are, they are both dead now, and can’t reveal anything about him. There is a murmuring in the crowd. Everyone is whispering about it, Kylo Ren, the masked monster who would kill anyone, even his own mother, for the First Order. Some of the people are disgusted, others are confused, but none of them want to come face to face with him. Good, let them fear him, it will help keep the masses in line, and make the First Order’s job that much easier. Ren smiles, and turns, leaving the stage. Hux walks in shortly after him. Inside the building, there is a flurry of action, when a short man in uniform approaches them. 

“We believe we have discovered a group of Resistance members hiding out on Prag. There are reports of marked Resistance ships in the area. How should we proceed?”

“Send a battalion of troopers, I want them found,” Hux tells the man before striding away. 

Ren has no more official business on the planet, but he isn’t ready to leave yet. No one knows what he looks like, aside from a select few individuals, and of course most of the resistance. Sighing, he goes into one of the sleeping quarters that is currently unused and begins to undress. A pair of stormtroopers saw him enter, but he makes them forget. Hesitating for a moment, Ren pulls his mask off, and stores it away along with his robes and armor. There are clothes that fit him in one of the drawers. It doesn't take him long to change. 

Quickly, Ren exits the room and walks down the halls. Because of his height, he draws some attention, but ultimately no one stops him. Once outside, he sees that most of the people have left, but a few linger in the square. None of them pay him any attention. Walking through the streets, he finds what he is looking for, a cantina. People are talking and laughing in the building. Except for a few people sitting alone at tables, no one pays him any mind. 

He sits at the bar and waits. The bartender approaches him, asking him what he wants, but then a small group of people enter the cantina. They’re Resistance fighters. Ren moves away from the bar into a table in the corner. None of the group that just entered notices him. Watching them like a hawk, he sees a few of them that he recognizes from somewhere, some… time long ago. Nothing comes to mind, but maybe the memories of them were removed during his training?

A sharp, stabbing pain behind his eyes stops his search. If the Supreme Leader feels it prudent to hide memories of these people, who is Ren to disregard his master’s wisdom. 

Turning his attention back to the Resistance fighters, Ren notices a girl he recognizes her from some of Poe’s memories. He stands and leaves gently touching her thoughts as he goes. She follows him into the streets. A hand grabs his arm, and when he looks back at her, she gasps in shock, backing away quickly. 

“More Resistance scum I see.”

She stares at him pain in her eyes. None too gently, Ren enters her thoughts. All he can feel at first is pain, deep crippling pain. Then loss rises up and mingles with her pain. The man she thinks about is the one his pet had cared so much about. Termin Wexley. Snap to his friends, and they had been more than friends. 

In the span of a few moments, Ren experiences all of the time the two had spent together. They had fucked only three times, and each different and unique. There are tears streaming down her face now, but Ren continues. He explores each time they were together, tainting each with his own thoughts, and insults. Quickly, he moves to her other memories of Snap, adding in little things removing others, corrupting the memories. He leaves one untouched. It is her, and Snap fighting over something trivial now that he's gone. They scream at each other.

“You’re a lying asshole, Snap! I never even touched any of the other pilots! Why do you refuse to listen to me?” She screams.

“I saw you with Poe last week going into his room, alone! What were you doing in there alone with him Jess? Did you fuck him?” Snap asks her.

In the memory, the woman apparently named Jess, screams back, “YOU ARE AN IDIOT, HE ASKED ME THERE TO TALK ABOUT MY FLYING! WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU SNAP!” 

He stares at her blankly. “I never want to see you again.”

“I hope you die!” She yells at him, and storms out of the room.

Back in the present, Jess falls to the ground on her knees. A couple of tears roll down her cheeks. Ren crouches down in front of her and he whispers, “You’re welcome, Jess.”

She stares back at him anger burning in her eyes. The streets are empty, no one in this part of town right now, Hux is giving another speech. 

“I will give you a few options. Option one I take you and the rest of your band of Resistance fighters to the capitol building, and you and your fellow terrorists get executed. Option two, you forget about everything, Poe, Snap, the Resistance, the First Order, your name, your life. Or finally, option three, you go in there and kill one of them. I will let the rest go, but you must pledge yourself to the First Order. Do you understand me, Jessika Pava?”

She swallows and nods. 

“What is your choice?” He asks quietly.

“Can I have a minute?” She pleads.

“No, I will choose for you in a minute.”

There is a moment of conflict on her features, but she comes to a conclusion. 

“I choose option two.”

Ren hums happily. He was hoping she would pick that one. 

“I’ll make you forget everything about the Resistance and all your current opinions on the First Order. Then once you have forgotten, I will order you to kill your friends, and you will do it without question.”

What she just agreed to dawns on Jess too late. She shakes her head, but when she tries to move away from Ren, he holds her in place with the force. Reaching into her thoughts again, he begins to distort and destroy the memories of her former life. Thoughts of her parents, her family, and her friends. On a whim, Ren leaves some of her memories of Poe intact. Perhaps his pet will want to see her again, perhaps not. 

Jessika’s mouth hangs open in a silent scream of pain as her past, her old life, her being is ripped from her without mercy. It takes only a few minutes, and Jess finally relaxes. Her expression goes blank, and her eyes glaze over slightly. She lies on the ground, waiting. With no hesitation, Ren begins making a fake life for her. 

As a child she had been raised in the unknown regions, her family worked hard to make a life for themselves. When she was fourteen, the village she lived in was attacked by pirates who enslaved her, and some of the other villagers. When she was twenty-one, the First Order rescued her, and the other surviving members of her village. A year later she was kidnapped by the Resistance. They trained her to believe that the First Order is evil and cruel and that they made her forget what the Order had done to help her. Just hours ago the Resistance forced her to come and try to free their general. After they failed, they went to a cantina to drink and try to forget. Jess had left for some fresh air when Ren had stumbled across her. Now here he is, helping her remember her true past. 

“Do you understand what the Resistance has done to you, Jessika?”

“Yes, sir.” She replies in a slightly angry tone. 

“Go get revenge on them, and return to the capitol building. Wait until it is dark, and kill them as they sleep.” Ren commands.

“Yes, sir.” She says again, then asks, “What if they don’t allow me into the building?”

“Tell them I am expecting you, and that they can speak to me if they have any questions.”

She nods and turns, taking a deep breath, she turns back to the cantina, entering it with a blank, but friendly expression on her face. He moves through the mostly empty streets and back to the capitol building. A few stormtroopers patrol through the city, but he slips through their patrols easily. 

Awhile back, Ren had discovered a secret backdoor into the capitol building, but he never felt a need to mention it to anyone. It is extremely easy for him to slip back into the building. The only person he crosses paths with is Hux, who raises an eyebrow at Ren, but he doesn’t comment and continues moving. No one sees him enter the room, and he redresses in his normal attire. Before he has a chance to place his mask on, Hux opens the door. 

“There is a meeting about the Terrorists on Prag. Although your presence is not required, we may ask for your assistance in the attack.” 

Ren puts his mask on and turns to Hux. 

“I will be there.”

 

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

The anger in him burns like a fiery inferno. She escaped. Again. It takes everything in him not to kill the officer standing in front of him. The man didn’t help in her escape, he did nothing to warrant being killed. Well, except for reporting all of this to Ren. Without warning, Ren dives into his head. 

Pushing past the fear and surface thoughts, Ren moves deeper into the man’s head, searching through his thoughts. The further Ren goes, the more he realizes that this officer is trying to hide something from him. As soon as Ren gets a glimpse of the thought, a new, and insignificant one appears to cover the one Ren wants. At first, the stream of thoughts, and memories are overwhelming, but they are slowing down to a trickle. Memories keep coming from the depths of the officer’s mind. 

Ren waits. 

He goes over every thought, waiting patiently for the one he wants. Now every memory the officer dredges up from the far corners of his mind, seems to cause him pain. Ren knows what memories they are. Secrets, private thoughts, everything someone would probably loathe to show another person. Without having to see the thoughts of the officer, Ren knows the man is almost definitely committing treason in someway. Or perhaps, the officer just too embarrassed by something. 

Finally, the memory appears, and before the officer can hide it, Ren drags it to the surface. The memory is of the man’s family. His wife and four-month-old son. Pain, fear, and sadness cling to the memory, as well as anger, and confusion. In front of the man, two stormtroopers, and an officer stand in front of the three of them. The officer in front of the man wants the man’s son. 

“No, you can’t take him from us!” the wife shouts at them. “He deserves better than be forced to become a stormtrooper!” 

The man is begging the other officer to reconsider. Of course, it gets him nowhere. Finally, the man hands the child over, allowing the officer and troopers take his son. A second memory, one the man is pushing to Ren instead of fighting, is connected to the last memory. It is the man stealing the security codes of a First Order general and searching through the databanks of the Order to find his son. It takes him longer than he wanted, but he finds it. FN-2187. 

The man pauses a moment and stares at the image of his son grown up into a young teenager. He begins switching his son’s duties out with that of other troopers, easier ones. Then he notices a test of compassion scheduled for a week from then. The man changes it to combat training. An ache forms in the man’s chest, he has passed his son in the hallways more than once without the slightest hint of acknowledgment on his part. Before anyone could catch him, the man had left the room, and returned to his duties. 

Another memory. The man passes FN-2187, but can’t act like he knows who his son is. It’s like a kick to the face A final memory is shoved forcefully to the front. This memory is soaked in happiness, and tinged with only a slight sadness. It is the memory of the day the man discovered that FN-2187 escaped with the Resistance pilot. He is saddened because he will probably be involved with the death of his son, but as long as his child get even a day of freedom, the man is happy. Ren pulls out of the man’s mind. Behind his mask, Ren studies the man. 

“What was your son’s name?” Ren asks abruptly, surprising even himself.

The man looks shocked, but answers. “Finn.”

“Really? You named him that?” Ren says, genuinely curious. 

“It is the only name that matters now.” The man responds. He looks fearful of Ren’s response. 

For some odd reason, Ren feels pity for the man and finds himself telling the man to run away. To get off the ship before he changes his mind. Without any further prompting, the man runs, and Ren lets him go. He feels the man get further and further from the ship. He goes to the bridge and sees people rushing around, Hux is furious and is ordering that the ship be shot down. The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree, Ren thinks. Hux turns around and notices Ren. 

“Why is one of my senior officers defecting after I sent him to report to you, Ren?” 

Kylo Ren looks down at Hux. Honestly, he is getting tired of Hux. 

“I did nothing to encourage him to run, maybe you just need to train your underlings better.”

Hux looks funny when he’s angry Ren thinks absently. Maybe Ren will help more of Hux’s officers escape just to see Hux angry again. Of course, he won’t though. It wouldn’t help the First Order, but it would still be entertaining. 

“I know you had something to do with this, Ren. I don’t know what, but I know you did something to cause him to desert.”

Ren frowns behind his mask. He isn’t entirely sure why he let the man escape. When he next speaks with the Supreme Leader he will have to explain himself. It’s not something he is looking forward to. Ignoring Hux’s angry glare, Ren exits the bridge. He has to meditate on this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wasn't a huge fan of this chapter so I rewrote the entire first chunk and went from there. All in all, I'm much happier with it now. I've decided to do rewrites for all of the chapters before I post the final chapter. So there's that. I want all of the chapters to all lead to the same end and as they are now it's kind of a mess. Once I finish that I'll post chapter 22. I might make a second part to this that continues where this story leaves off.


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